#apparently my appetite is coming back
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I want a breakfast date.
#im kind of hungry#apparently my appetite is coming back#and I want waffles and fruit and coffee and good company ❤️
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oatmeal made with applesauce + brown sugar + cinnamon + apple slices & candied ginger on top... good meal for a bad tummy
#when will my appetite come back from the war#i tried peanut butter with my banana earlier and that was a step too far apparently :(#food
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Oh boy, urge to restrict sure is big today 🥲
#i can’t even tell where the impulse is coming from#nothing really changed#but apparently it’s a feeling of accomplishment for my brain when I manage to beat my own appetite#no need to worry though I am not where I have once been#and I can manage one or two days of eating a bit less as long as I get back to my routines soon#my days of eating under my maintenance are over anyway because I have a protein goal that i couldn’t reach without eating enough#i just shouldn’t eat less over a longer period of time to uphold my cycle and hormone levels#ugh seriously brain wtf#delete later
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#my cousin’s baby mama tried to kill me unprovoked today#idk why but the more I furiously blast it the more I can get over it#it also shows how little my family cares about boundaries that are set#I’ve told my cousin countless times baby mama 3 ain’t allowed here and she’s come over countless times#today she randomly flips her lid as I’m walking to my car#and I’m like????? cause damn sometimes I do wanna unalive but not at any one’s hand other than my own#and cops got called twice today#she came back in the evening bc they let her go and they were like omg post partum depression#and I’m like see this is why I don’t want kids cause apparently you lose your fucking kind#mind*#so then I hear her yelling and threatening me and I’m glaring at my aunt after ripping her and my cousin a new one after work#lost my appetite and all#and I gotta pick myself up after work and pretend nothing happened#no one ever bothered to check up on me in my family#my abuela calls to check up on my cousin and aunt but didn’t bother to check to see if I was okay#like Lmao I hate my family#like deadass I know it’s a strong ass word but I sincerely I just—cannot be arsed with them#they’re fucking selfish assholes#so yeah#today I hate them
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College student!Sukuna
2:35am: late night cravings
you couldn’t sleep.
there was an itch you were desperate to scratch, it made your mouth water, nails digging into your palms as you shuffled in bed, chewing on your bottom lip. you desperately wanted chinese takeaway. realising you hadn’t had it in a while, it was all you could think about.
there was one near campus, a ten-minute drive away, that was open all night, much to the delight of all the students coming back from late night outs or pulling all-nighters, thank the university gods.
of course, you could quell your urge by going out to get some chow mein and dim sum on your own, but if sukuna woke up to you out of bed and in the streets in the middle of night by yourself, again, he would actually kill you.
and you couldn’t possibly wake your boyfriend up; sukuna was sleeping so soundly beside you, snoring by your ear in a way you took comfort in – it had become white noise for you. his arm is thrown over your waist, the weight pinning you to the bed. scared to wake him, you tried your best to stay still.
apparently, not well enough.
“what’s wrong with you, you brat?”
his voice was groggy, crackled with sleep. despite the irritation in his words, you took no offence, after all, you had learnt very quickly after first meeting him that that was just simply how he spoke. always annoyed, so impatient, a barely constrained anger at the world that seemed to stem from nowhere. and you loved it so much.
with a sheepish giggle, you traced the tattoos on his arm almost as an apology, soothing the sparks of ire within him. “sorry, kuna. just hungry.”
the moonlight beaming through the small gap in his curtains illuminated the space, helping your eyesight adjust to the darkness as you watched your boyfriend’s face crumple in complaint over being awoken.
“yeah? well, go eat something then.”
you pouted, reaching your hand to brush a lock of hair out of his still-shut eyes, fingertips trailing on his forehead, smoothing out that furrow between his brows he always had. he never listened when you told him off about getting premature wrinkles, not now as his long-time girlfriend and certainly not as the friend he had pined for for months.
“but kunaaaa, i want chinese. i’m gonna die if i don’t eat it.”
his fingers were drumming against your ribs as he huffed in amusement. he didn’t think he’d ever get used to your theatrics, and he’d definitely never tell you he loved them, it would just encourage you.
“that’s unfortunate, but a sacrifice i’m willing to make.”
your gasp came without missing a beat and so did the slap against his back he had been expecting. it made the corner of his lips twitch before he rolled over, the warmth of his body disappearing as he stretched, back muscles rippling with the movement in that delectable way you wished you could capture and bury inside you.
“alright, you spoiled brat. let’s fucking go.”
you squealed. “oh my god, really?”
he had stepped into the corner of his room that the moon’s reach didn’t graze, rustling through drawers to find a hoodie to throw over his bare torso. without needing to see his face you knew he was rolling his eyes; it was followed with that tsk noise he was known for.
“yeah, well, unfortunately for me, my girl’s got a big appetite. if i don’t feed her, she might just eat me.”
#jjk x reader#sukuna x you#sukuna x reader#sukuna fluff#sukuna angst#jjk fluff#jjk drabble#sukuna drabble#sukuna oneshot#jjk oneshot#jjk angst#jjk college au
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Big Guy Big Belly
König is a big man, and with a big man comes a big appetite. We’re talking about a 6’10 man constantly maintaining his peak physique. He needs to be consuming as many calories and as much protein, carbs, fats, fiber and more to keep himself in fit and fighting shape.
At the canteen, he’s a nightmare. I bet that people rush to the cafeteria just to make sure they get something to eat before the big man on base rolls up. He’ll clear out the bins if he gets a chance. There’s a rumour on base that the reason König fought so hard to climb the ranks so quickly was just to be able to eat more and get away with it. Little do they know that they’re absolutely right, but König will never say that out loud. Ever. There’s some secrets you take to your grave.
Either way, König is a menace in the canteen. He’ll pile his plate as high as he can when he gets a chance. He’s packing away all he can get in the shortest amount of time he can, and everyone has to suffer for it. The worst part is that everyone has to rush to get to the caf before König, and König knows exactly what others are doing, so he’s in a daily race against the entire base to eat his fill. It’s always a photo-finish to see who gets to the cafeteria first. König currently has been slacking, so he’s not been eating like he normally has. Is he mad? Not really. He’ll clean out the snack cart later.
He’s a monster late at night. Everyone knows that you need to leave the big man to his snacks, lest you face the wrath of the colossus on base. Well, wrath in a peculiar way. He just gets quiet and angry, but it’s still not a fun experience to try and fight him for a sandwich. If you take the last egg salad sandwich you’ll be at the top of his shit list for the next week. Don’t even think he won’t track you down. He’ll throw around his rank just to get his hands on the poor bastard. Nobody is safe, either.
Stiletto only once took the last pudding cup. Once. She never made that mistake again. For a week he was giving her dirty looks over a cold shoulder as he bumbled down the hall. She eventually had to give in and sacrifice a desert to be able to get back in his good graces. She still thinks he’s a massive bitch because of it. And you know what? She’s right. Everybody knows she’s right, König included, but he’ll keep going after whoever ‘steals’ ‘his’ snacks. They get along a bit better now that they’ve both advanced in rank and worked together, but there was a good period of time where Stiletto had to sleep with one eye open.
It gets a bit better for everyone when König finally finds a partner and doesn’t stay on base so often. Everyone takes a moment to pray for the poor soul who has to cook for König whenever he gets home from deployment.
See, during deployment, König can’t be such a massive bitch about food. He gets his rations, and that’s that. He can’t steal from anybody else, so he gets stuck with these pitiful MREs that barely fill him up. It’s miserable, and he’s losing weight like crazy when on the field. He’s running on fumes and burning calories like crazy as he’s risking his life out there. It’s gotten to a point where König has taken to eating with hostages post-rescue to ‘help them feel safer’ (read: get more food into his gullet). Thankfully, he puts his best foot forward when dealing with victims of trauma and ensures that he has somebody else do all the socializing while he plays with the kids after dinner. Apparently, after the inevitable shower of tears whenever kids have to face König, he becomes pretty popular. They love to use him as a jungle gym (and make fun of him) and he’s just happy to get more to eat. He’ll take being called ‘bigger than even my dad!’, being told ‘you’re weird’ or being asked ‘why are you so big and scary all the time?’ any day for a little extra to eat. He can tolerate a few kids. He won’t ever admit that hanging around them makes him want some kids of his own, or at least not to Horangi, who’s already teasing König about being a surrogate father to the kids. König tells him to keep it to himself, but Horangi is already buying things for the baby shower.
Once König finally comes home, that’s when all Hell breaks loose. This man has been starving and he needs food NOW. He won’t take no for an answer. If you don’t have something prepared, he’ll be ordering a massive order of takeout the likes of which you’ve never seen before in your life. He’ll hit multiple places on his way back to your place if he doesn’t think you’ve been able to get something together for him. If you can’t cook, he won’t even bother telling you to cook for him and just focus on getting a whole banquet of junk food ready for when he arrives home. He brings the pizzas in the door before he even brings in his own bags. You’ll have to go out and grab his bag as he sets up his personal buffet table. The worst part is despite how much he can shove down, he always buys more than he can eat, so you’ve got a couple of days worth of food to shove in the fridge at the end of the night.
If you can cook, this is a multi-day experience. Is it rewarding? Absolutely. Is it painful? Abso-fucking-lutely. He’s got you slaving for hours a day just to get him a nice home cooked meal. You’ll be going all out to get him a big enough meal. We’re thinking a tray of mac and cheese, a whole roast chicken, easily a handful of loaded baked potatoes. If you have something from your traditional cuisine, he’s not picky, he’ll gobble it up in a heartbeat. Knowing you made it for him is more than enough for him. Food is the way to a man’s heart, some say, and König will never let you go if you treat him like the king he is.
The good thing about cooking König such a big meal is that he gives back. He’s not a fan of cooking, but for the next few days he’ll take over cooking and cleaning in the kitchen. It’s just an easy way for him to give back, you know? He can’t thank you enough with words, so why not with actions?
But the best part of König giving back is that he’s an excellent cook. He cooks mostly traditional food from his culture, but he’s down for some french or italian cooking if you’re into it. He can make a mean lasagne. He does not skimp on the cheese, this man. No he’s a cheese fiend. If you’re lactose intolerant, you’ve got another thing coming for you. He will hand feed you lactaid just for the meal. If you have a dietary restriction, he’ll learn how to cook your types of meals in abundance. He’s perfect that way. Vegetarian, vegan, keto, no matter what, he’s got your back. He’s learned how to make an excellent spread for a dinner party, and part of learning to cater to others is to work around other people’s diets; his mother drilled that rule into his little head as a kid. He does it without complaint, too. For at least a week after coming home, he’s just so happy to be around food in abundance again. He’s absolutely thriving in the kitchen before the thrill wears off and he’s back to avoiding cooking like the plague again.
He loves to eat, but usually hates to cook. He’ll mostly eat takeout until he actually has to eat a nutritious meal again for a change. It’s not that cooking is awful, it’s just that he hates doing the dishes. He’d be far more inclined if he didn’t have to do the dishes afterwards. If you take over dishes, he’ll definitely step up his game for the both of you.
All in all, König loves to eat. He’s a big man with a bigger appetite, as hard as that is to believe. Once he retires he has to learn to cut back a fair bit, but he never loses his taste for sweets and snacks. It’s just something you’ll have to learn to live with.
#konig relationship#konig shenanigans#konig#cod konig#konig cod#konig call of duty#konig mw2#konig x reader#konig x you#konig fluff#konig fanart#fan art#digital art#cod mw2#cod#cod mwii#cod x reader#call of duty#modern warfare#konig fanfiction#konig headcanons#cod headcanons#konig hcs#horangi#horangi cod#stiletto cod
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Could I pretty please request a cregan fanfic, where he gets jealous/possessive over the reader? I adore the way you write him! Thank you so much for your time❤️❤️
A/N: this has been in my drafts for a while now. i did a birthday poll and cregan did not win by any means but its my birthday and its storming and im sad and i just want someone to be kind to me. i hope you like this nonnie
Flicker
One could easily say that Lord Cregan Stark was a fair person. He is just and generous with the decisions he makes for his people. But if the matter is with his bride, there is no just or generous, only selfish and greedy; he has no inclination to share.
Cregan Stark x Reader | 1k+ | cw: fem!reader, wife!reader, irrational!cregan lol, fluff?, typos, etc.
Cregan clenches his jaw at the sight of you from across the yard. Not one, but two young lords are hot on your heels. They have not let up tailing you since they've arrived and, what's worse, is that you have been so terribly temperate with them.
The Lord Of Winterfell is beside himself in jealousy, and as the hour grows later, the cloud over him grows darker.
He could not blame those... young lords for acting a moth drawn to flame, in fact, he understood perfectly, but he can blame them for taking up your time. This was a harvest festival after all. How can Lady Stark make her rounds with two shadows weighing her down?
Just as you giggle at whatever nonsense was spoken to you, you turn and find not two faces but one broad back. Cregan grumbles, "boys."
The young lords, with their grins, nod at their liege lord, "Lord Stark."
"I'm sure my wife has enjoyed your company, but, it is nigh time for her to entertain other matters."
You come to your husband's side. He turns to you, seeing your smile's been replaced with raised brows. His own furrow.
"Come now, my lord," one of the two speak, "we were just telling our dear lady the folklo-"
"My dear lady had much else to do," Cregan interrupts, voice louder than necessary. He rolls his shoulders back, and suddenly the great sword on his back is more apparent than it was moment ago.
Though the two knew the Lord was not quick to resort to violence, still, they understood that it was time for them to depart, so they do.
Your face contorts as you watch your husband's nostrils flair after the two leave, his hot breath condensing with the cold air. He turns to you and you expect him to give you a talking to. You are frozen in shock when he merely nods and walks away.
Confusion holds your features, so you follow him. Cregan simply goes back to what he was doing, however, which was speaking to one of the farmers about the colts in his stables.
You are left confused, and honestly hurt by the strange treatment from him. After realizing he did not actually want you around him, you find something else to do. Cregan, though kept constantly preoccupied, keeps a close watch, and he is glad that no one lingers longer than they should this time around.
By the end of the day, when you are home eating supper, there is a tension between you two that only you can feel. Cregan is happily finishing his meal when you call out to him.
He averts his attention from his nearly empty bowl to you, "yes, my love?"
You press your lips together, doubting the otherwise plain way the pet name falls off his lips. You procure the gift you'd ben keeping on your lap the whole dinner, pushing it across the table to your husband.
Cregan's brows quirk at the wrapped object. He unfolds it, finding the gift to be a handful of candies. He turns back with a smile, "sweeties."
You return his smile with a softer one, "your favorite."
He pushes the sweets to the middle of the table, "dessert."
You turn to your bowl; you've only eaten half of your food, but your appetite was no longer present. Your husband takes a sweetie, then pushes it closer to you, urging you to take one. So, you do, popping it in your mouth.
"Thank you, love."
You release a breath, finally finding it in you to relax upon receiving the expression you did, "I take it you are no longer cross with me."
"Cross?" his brows knit, "whoever said such a lie?"
You raise your brows, "you ignored me the whole time after telling off Lord Caplan and Derby."
Cregan clears his throat, straightening up in his chair, "aye, I told them off, but I was not ignoring you. I told you I would be preoccupied greatly today."
You deflate "... Yes," you look around aimlessly, "you did."
Cregan's face hardens. He sighs, pushing his chair back, "come to me."
You stare at him for a moment. Part of you wishes to be difficult but you decide to slowly come over to him. Once you were within arm's reach, he scoops you into him and seals you against his chest.
You instinctively adjust atop him, arm coming around his shoulders while his own circle around your torso. He presses a few kisses on your neck before you lean into him. He rubs your sides, "forgive me if it appeared so, my heart."
You turn to him, frowning, "it did appear so, my lord."
Cregan's brows quirk. My lord? What horror. What pain. He frowns back, eager to set things straight, "how might I make it up to you?"
You ghost your fingertips down his cheek, examining his distraught expression. You lean your forehead against his, "I don't know."
Cregan tightens his hold on you, sighing out, "please. I do not wish to be your lord."
The faintest of chuckles slip past your lips, "mmm, but you are my lord, Lord Stark."
His one hand squeezes your thigh, "do not insult me so cruelly, my love."
You giggle under your breath and cup his cheeks.
Cregan relaxes slightly, but he still urges you with his eyes.
"Very well," you hum, "first, you must confess... were you jealous of the two lords?"
"Yes," he admits unabashedly quick.
You are taken off guard by it. You knit your brows and tilt your head, "w h y ?"
"Why?" he tilts his head the other way, "my person smiles at another. Need I say more?"
You raise a brow in disbelief of his explanation.
Cregan nuzzles against you neck, "I cannot help my feelings. Do not hold it so bitterly against me."
You chuckle and clutch the back of his head, leaning your cheek on him, "now... my dear—"
He perks, pulling away to look at you.
"—why ever would I do such a thing?"
Cregan grins, then peppers kisses across your jaw, "my thoughts exactly."
You push him away, gaining his full attention again, "but there is another thing you must do, silly pup."
His nostrils flare. It is not his favorite pet name, but he'd rather that than my lord. "Name it."
You trace his nose before tapping the tip, "take me to bed."
You yelp at the immediate reaction, as does the chair that crashes behind your husband when he jolts to his feet to carry you back into your quarters.
#cregan stark#cregan stark fanfic#cregan stark fic#cregan stark fluff#cregan stark fanfiction#cregan#creagn fic#cregan fanfic#cregan fluff#cregan fanfiction#house of the dragon#house of the dragon fic#cregan x reader#cregan stark x reader
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Camping — oneshot
Harry and Y/N were friends in college until that day. Now they are being forced to face one another...
Author's note: this one shot was posted on Patreon a long time ago. Happy that you all have a chance to read it!
check out my patreon and get access to this week new one shot (y/n's bff dad) and much more :)
warning: smut
word count: 4.8K
masterlist
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"I can’t believe you’re making me do this," she said as April tossed her backpack into the back of her car. "This feels like kidnapping."
"Stop being so dramatic and get in the car," April replied, a big smile on her face. You and April had been best friends since college, bonding over the ridiculous workload assigned to your class each week. You were opposites: you loved city life, running water, and comfort, while April thrived on nature, adventure, and challenges. She adored plants and meticulously cared for the ones she had at home. In contrast, April had once gifted you a cactus, which you managed to kill.
"I got us muffins and coffee from that place you love," April said.
"Is this your way of bribing me into going?" you asked, reaching for the bag of treats. "I know this is Mark’s idea." April just shrugged as she started driving.
"Aren’t you tired of the city? This will be good for you! All you do is work, sleep, watch The Office, work out, and repeat," April said, giggling as you stopped chewing.
"Leave The Office out of this," you warned. It had been your favorite show since high school, your comfort show, always playing in your apartment. You even tried to get others hooked on it. "I’ve seen you laugh."
"Listen, there’s something I need to tell you," April said, turning down the music.
"Did Mark propose?" you asked immediately, knowing they were endgame. The three of you had met in college and stayed close ever since.
"No," April replied.
"You’re pregnant then?!"
"Shut up!" April interrupted. "Harry is coming. Mark invited him, and I had no say in it," she blurted out, like ripping off a band-aid.
"Oh! Let me out. I am not going," you said, instantly annoyed at the mention of his name. "I thought Mark and he weren’t friends anymore."
"He just came back from America. He called Mark a few weeks ago, and they had drinks and dinner together. Apparently, he’s changed and is more mature." You rolled your eyes as you finished eating your muffin. Your appetite was gone, and you felt suddenly nervous. "You have to let go of that grudge against him!"
"It’s not a grudge, April. The man ghosted me after we had sex. That was all he was after. Him leaving was the best thing that could have happened to all of us," you said. You had fallen for his charm, and after much convincing, you finally gave in during your senior year.
"You’ve moved on, and so has he. I’m just asking you to be polite, babe," April insisted. "I just want us to have a good time."
You sighed, leaning back in your seat as the cityscape blurred past. "Fine. But if he starts anything, I'm not holding back."
April laughed, patting your leg. "That's the spirit. Just remember, we're here to relax and have fun."
The rest of the drive was filled with casual chatter and music, the tension slowly easing. As you neared your destination, a clearing in the woods where you would set up camp, you couldn't help but appreciate the serene beauty of the place. The stress of city life began to melt away, replaced by a reluctant sense of peace.
April parked the car and you both got out, stretching your legs and taking in the fresh air. "It’s gorgeous out here," you admitted begrudgingly.
"See? Told you it would be worth it," April said, grinning.
Mark emerged from behind the car, waving. "Hey, you two! Glad you made it. I'm surprised you managed to convince Y/N,” he said, wrapping his arms around April.
“It took a lot,” April giggled as Mark kissed her cheek. “Muffins and coffee.”
“I can still go back,” you said, throwing your backpack over your shoulder. “How long is this hike going to take?” you asked, walking up to Mark and giving him a friendly side hug.
“About thirty minutes. Is that fine or are you going to melt?” he teased, grinning.
April slapped his chest playfully before opening the trunk to get the rest of the stuff out. “Where’s your friend, anyway? Or is he still the unpunctual asshole he always was?”
“M’ right here” Harry said as he emerged from the trail that they were going to take to the campsite. You abstained from saying anything surprised at his appearance. He had kept his good looks. He had even gotten more attractive with more age. However, you would never admit it aloud.
April turned to look at you with her eyes widen opened. You gave her the same look, letting her know that you agreed. Harry wore tiny black shorts that left little to imagination. His legs seemed to never end and his thighs were inked. His grey shirt was tight enough sculpt his chest and his pectorals. His curls were tucked under his basketball cap and his eyes hidden away by some aviator sunglasses.
“You were saying, Y/N? I didn’t catch the last part” Harry asked you, with a small smirk. “Are you still a yapping bitch?”
“Just that we should start the hike” You responded, looking straight at him. You weren’t the same quiet and shy girl you were in college. You had matured and life experiences had shaped you. You were more outgoing and vocal about your opinions.
“I thought so” you heard him say as you turned your back towards him.
As you all gathered the camping gear, the anticipation of the weekend settled in. The woods were peaceful, with the sun filtering through the trees, casting dappled shadows on the ground. Birds chirped in the distance, and the fresh scent of pine filled the air.
Mark led the way, carrying the heavier equipment with Harry, while April and you followed. Despite your reservations, the beauty of the surroundings began to work its magic, and you found yourself relaxing a bit.
After a short walk, you reached the designated camping spot, a small clearing by a bubbling brook. It was picturesque, almost like a scene from a nature magazine. You couldn’t help but admit, if only to yourself, that it was a nice change from the city’s hustle and bustle.
"That was more than thirty minutes," you complained, dropping to the ground to rest your legs. "You're lucky the view was pretty." Mark and April laughed, while Harry remained silent, just watching you.
"Let's set up camp," Mark said, and he and April began unloading the gear. You took the opportunity to pull out the speaker and connect your phone.
As you selected a playlist, music filled the air, blending with the natural sounds of the forest. You watched as Mark and April worked together seamlessly, their laughter and chatter a comforting background noise. Harry joined in, helping with the heavier items, his actions precise and deliberate. You couldn’t help but feel a simmering resentment toward him, remembering the night that had led up to the hate that you had grown towards him.
You glanced around, taking in the beauty of the campsite. Tall trees encircled the clearing, their leaves rustling in the soft breeze. The nearby brook added a soothing melody to the scene, and the late afternoon sun cast a warm, golden glow over everything.
Harry approached, handing you a bottle of water. "You looked like you could use this," he said, his tone neutral.
"Thanks," you replied curtly, accepting the bottle but avoiding eye contact. His gesture did little to ease the tension between you.
With the tents set up and the campsite organized, the four of you gathered around the fire pit. Mark expertly built a fire, and soon the flames were crackling as the sun descended behind the trees, providing warmth and a focal point for the group.
"How was America?" Mark asked Harry as he handed him a beer. "Did you enjoy living there?"
"It was nice for a while," Harry replied, taking a sip. "But it got lonely after a bit. I'm actually happy to be back."
"Marketing, right?" April asked, earning a quick nod from Harry.
You listened quietly, not fully trusting his cheerful demeanor. It was hard to forget the history between you.
"Well, we're glad to have you back," Mark said, clinking his beer bottle against Harry’s. "It’s like old times again."
April smiled, trying to lighten the mood. "Yeah, just with more responsibilities and less reckless behavior."
"Speak for yourself," Mark joked, earning a playful nudge from April.
Harry chuckled, but his eyes kept drifting toward you. You avoided his gaze, focusing on the fire instead.
Mark instantly got up from his spot, his eyes twinkled mischievously as he took off his jacket and shirt.
April raised an eyebrow, “What are you doing?!”
“I’m going for a swim” he said, grinning widely as he took of his pants along with his boxers.
You burst out laughing, shaking your head as you covered your eyes not wanting to look at your best friend’s boyfriend privates.
“A swim? It’s pretty late, Mark.” April said as Mark used his hands to cover himself.
“Why not?” Mark said, standing up and stretching. “We’re out here in the middle of nowhere, no one around for miles. It’ll be fun.” He wanted to cut the tension. He wanted for everyone to have fun and it was a way to get everyone out of the funk especially the both of you. “Oh, it’s fucking cold” He said as he ran towards the lake.
April rolled her eyes but smiled. “You’re crazy, you know that?” she yelled after him as she got up from her spot.
“That’s why you love me,” Mark quipped, winking at her.
You bit your lip, considering it. The idea was wild and spontaneous, something you wouldn’t normally do. But maybe that’s what made it appealing.
“Alright,” you said, surprising yourself. “I’m in. But if anyone mentions this to anyone back home, I’m denying everything.” as you started stripping. You couldn’t see Harry, but you could feel Harry’s stare on you.
April laughed. “This should be interesting. Okay, I’m in too.”
Mark clapped his hands together. “Harry?” He yelled as he splashed water. The water was surprisingly warmer than expected.
As soon as your pants came off, you sprinted towards the water, not wanting to give anyone a chance to inspect your body. April followed right behind you, and before you knew it, both of you were submerged in the cool, refreshing water.
The initial shock of the cold water took your breath away, but it quickly turned invigorating. You surfaced, laughing and pushing your wet hair out of your face. April emerged beside you, her laughter echoing across the lake.
"This is crazy!" she shouted, her eyes sparkling with excitement.
Harry was right behind, diving into the water with loud splashes. The four of you swam around, the thrill of the spontaneous adventure making everyone giddy.
"Not your worst idea, Mark," you admitted, floating on your back and gazing up at the starry sky. "This is lovely." Mark grinned, splashing water at you.
“Things haven’t changed at much. We still let you convince us into doing shit” said, his tone lighter than it had been all evening.
For a while, you all floated and swam, the cool water refreshing and the company surprisingly pleasant. The tension and animosity seemed to wash away with the gentle waves.
The atmosphere grew quieter as April nestled closer to Mark, the two of them wrapped up in each other's presence, sharing quiet moments and exchanging soft words. The only sounds breaking the silence were the faint music playing in the background and the gentle crackling of the fire.
You glanced over at April and Mark, their closeness evident in the way they leaned into each other, their whispered conversations carrying an intimacy that made you smile despite yourself. It was a rare sight, seeing them so openly affectionate, and you couldn't help but feel a pang of envy mixed with genuine happiness for them.
Harry saw opposite you, lost in his thoughts as he stared at the sky. The events of the evening seemed to have softened his demeanor, his usual guarded expression replaced by a contemplative look. For once, the animosity between you felt less palpable, overshadowed by the camaraderie of the evening.
The music played softly in the background, a soothing backdrop to the quiet moments shared among friends. The night air was cool against your skin, but the warmth of the water and the company kept you comfortable.
"It's good to see you again, pup," Harry spoke up suddenly, his voice breaking the peaceful silence. The old nickname tugged at your emotions. He had called you that since college, back when you both shared dreams and aspirations.
You looked at him, caught off guard by his unexpected warmth. "Yeah," you replied softly.
"I heard you landed your dream job," he continued, glancing at you with a hint of a smile. You nodded, trying to conceal your own smile. "A reporter for BBC News. I remember how you used to talk about it non-stop. Proud of you."
“Thanks. How is your mom and Gemma?" you asked, recalling that final year of uni when Harry had invited you to his family home. It had been Easter weekend, a time when you got to meet the two women who made Harry’s world turn.
Harry's face softened at the mention of his family. "They're doing well," he replied, a hint of fondness in his voice. "Mom's as busy as ever, and Gemma is a mum now”
"Wait, what?!" You were taken aback, genuinely surprised by the news. It was unexpected, and you hadn't seen it coming.
Harry chuckled softly at your surprised reaction, his eyes reflecting a mix of amusement and pride. "Yeah, she had a baby girl a few months ago," he explained, his voice tinged with happiness. "It's been quite the adjustment, but she's doing great."
You couldn't help but smile at the thought of Gemma as a mother. "That's amazing," you replied genuinely. "Congratulations to her."
As you processed this new information, you felt a twinge of nostalgia for the times you had spent with Harry and his family. It seemed like another lifetime ago, yet the memories were still vivid in your mind. Despite the distance that had grown between you, moments like these reminded you of the bonds that once connected you.
"Listen, Y/N..." Harry began, but he was swiftly cut off by Mark and April.
"We're heading out. We are starving!" Mark called out, trailing after April as they exited.
Harry paused, his words hanging in the air as Mark and April hurriedly headed towards the campsite. You exchanged a glance with Harry, both of you momentarily sidelined by the interruption.
“I’ll see you out there” You said, trying to sound casual despite the awkwardness of the moment. Deep down, you wondered what Harry had wanted to say—whether it was something about the past or the tentative future you both seemed to be tiptoeing around. However, you didn’t want to stay behind. You weren’t skeptical about giving him a chance to explain himself.
Carefully, you swam back to shore and climbed out of the water. Attempting to regain your composure and stride confidently back to camp, you couldn't help but feel you'd failed miserably, especially with the chilly air gnawing at you.
Everyone changed into comfortable clothes while Mark prepared hot dogs for dinner.
"Did you bring your sleeping bag?" April asked, emerging from her tent.
"Yeah, I think so. It was in the hall by the door," you replied, brushing your hair. As you watched April search for it, a feeling of panic began to creep in. You mentally retraced your steps, recalling the things you had taken out of the trunk.
"No way," you muttered under your breath, frantically rummaging through your belongings. "I thought we grabbed everything!"
"What’s wrong? What are you looking for?" Harry asked, wanting to help.
"I think I left my sleeping bag at home," you sighed, realizing it was going to be a tough night. You had brought your tent, but sleeping on the bare ground wasn’t part of the plan.
Harry frowned, considering the situation. "we'll figure something out," he said, his voice reassuring.
Mark, overhearing the conversation, turned from the campfire where he was tending to the hot dogs. "I brought an extra blanket. It's not a sleeping bag, but it should help.”
"Thanks, Mark," you said, grateful for the gesture. Still, the thought of an uncomfortable night's sleep loomed over you.
April emerged triumphantly with a blanket. "Here, hopefully this makes it more comfortable," she said.
You took the blanket from her, managing a small smile. This trip was definitely not going as you had expected—it seemed like one thing after another.
"Hot dogs are ready!" Mark announced cheerfully as he handed everyone their plate and they gathered around the fire.
“Remember the last time we went camping?” April asked as she swallowed a bite of her hot dog.
“Wasn’t that the time that Mark though there was a bear attacking us?” Harry smirked, taking a bite of his hot dog. “What animal was it?”
“It was a racoon” You joined in, the memory making you chuckle.
“In my defense it was SO loud! It made a lot of noise” Mark laughed, shaking his head. “It was bloody big”.
"Was that before or after you tried to scare it away by singing 'Eye of the Tiger' at the top of your lungs?” April busted out laughing.
“He was so off-key. I am surprised the racoon put up a fight”
“I was just trying to protect us!” Mark threw up his hands in mock indignation.
Everyone busted into laughter again, the tension had melted away in the shared amusement. For a moment, it felt like old times, with jokes and stories like in college.
Later, as you settled into your tent with the borrowed blanket, you couldn’t help but think about all the conversations that you had with your friends. Harry's earlier attempt to talk still lingered in your mind, and you knew that the conversation was far from over.
Just as you were about to drift off, you heard a soft knock on the tent flap. "Hey, you still awake?" It was Harry’s voice.
You sat up, your heart beating a little faster. "Yeah, what’s going on?"
Harry unzipped the tent entrance and peeked in, holding a sleeping bag. "I thought you might need this."
"You brought an extra one?" you asked, suspicion creeping into your voice.
"Yeah," he replied, but his eyes betrayed him. You knew Harry too well to be fooled.
"You're lying," you said, stopping him just as he turned to leave. "You can’t fool me. I know you, Harry Styles. I know this is your sleeping bag."
He paused, a sheepish smile tugging at his lips. "So, what if it is?"
"That I’m not taking your sleeping bag from you," you insisted, handing it back to him. "Thank you, though."
He hesitated, the flickering firelight casting shadows across his face. "Let's share it then," he suggested softly.
You blinked, taken aback by his offer. You were nervous. The though of you sharing such a tight space and being in such proximity made your heart beat faster and the palms of your hands sweaty.
“Are you sure?” You asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
“Yeah,” he said firmly, stepping into the tent. “It’s cold, and I don’t want you to be uncomfortable”.
With a nod, you scooted over to make room. Harry stretched out the sleeping back and unzipped it for both of you. As you both settled into the sleeping bag, the proximity was comforting, but unsettling at the same time. The warmth of his body next to yours was a stark contrast to the chilly night air. You both shared a pillow and the blanket that April had giving you.
His scent enveloped you — a mix of pine, musk and a hint of the campfire smoke. His warmth radiated through the thin layers of the fabric, soothing the chill of the night air. The gently rise and fall of his chest against your back created a rhythmic presence. His arm draped lightly over your side and the sensation of his body pressed against yours brought an unexpected sense of nostalgia.
“Are you confortable?” He whispered as if sharing. secret, as if what you were doing was somehow forbidden.
You nodded slight, feeling the wright of his questions. “I am” you whispered back, the darkness amplifying the intimacy of the moment.
The silence that followed was filled with the soft sounds of the forest and the distant crackle of the campfire outside.
“Thank you” you murmured, your voice barely audible.
“No problem” he replied softly, his words brushing against the back of your neck, sending a shiver down your spine.
You closed your eyes, allowing yourself to sink into the moment. There was still something in the air. Something unspoken.
“Remember that night?” Harry whispered after a while, his voice a gently murmur in the quiet night. Referring to the night of passion that they had shared back in uni. The night that had stayed with you ever since.
“Every second of it” you replied, your voice tinged with a mixture of longing and hurt. Memories flooding back, vivid and bittersweet. You could still recall the feel of his lips, the way his touch had ignited a fire within you. “Why did you never call or text back?”
Harry sighed softly, his warm breath against your neck. “I was a coward,” he admitted, his voice thick with regret. “I was scared of what I felt for you, of how much you meant to me. I didn’t know how to handle it, so I ran”
His words hung in the air, heavy with unspoken emotions. You turn slightly to look at him, your eyes searching his for the truth. In the dim light of the tent, you could see raw vulnerability that he rarely showed.
“I thought I wasn’t good enough for you” You admitted, “I resented you for it” Tears welled up in your eyes, a mixture of relief and sorrow.
“I am wrong. I was so wrong. I missed you” he confessed. Harry reached out, gently brushing a tear from your cheek.
The air between you grew thick with unspoken words and lingering emotions. His eyes locked onto yours, his gaze intense and unwavering. You could feel yourself drawing closer, every inch of space between you crackling with tension. The warmth of his body, the gently rise and fall of his chest and the soft brush of his breath against your skin all conspired to lure you to him.
He hesitated, his eyes flicking down to your lips, and you felt like your breath hitch, the moment stretching into an eternity. The desire to close the gap, to feel the familiar yet thrilling sensation of his kiss, was overwhelming and every fiber of you yearned for that kiss that would final bridge all those years of resentment.
Harry’s gaze was intense, his eyes searching yours as if trying to decipher your every thought. His hand trembled slightly as he reached out, cupping your cheek with a tenderness that spoke volumes.
With a deep breath, Harry leaned in slowly, closing the miniscule gap between you. His lips brushed against yours with a feather light touch, tentative yet filled with longing. His lips were warm and soft, fitting against yours as if they had always belonged there.
A soft sigh escaped Harry’s lips, a mixture of relief. His hand moved from your cheek to the nape of your neck, pulling you closer. The kiss deepened, each movement a silent confession of years of yearning and regret.
Lost in the moment, you ran your fingers through his hair, savoring the texture and the closeness it brough. His touch sent sparks through your body, awakening every nerve ending with a delicious ache between your legs that only he could take care of.
“Let me have you” His breath mingling with yours as he whispered, “I want you so bad” His hand took yours, guiding it to him, making you feel the intensity of his longing and the very evident erection that he had grown for her. His words hung in the air, heavy with desire.
You nodded slowly, your breath hitching in your throat. "Yes," you whispered, your voice trembling with anticipation. "I want you too.” You didn’t think much about it. Your mind was too clouded.
Harry closed the distance between you, his lips capturing yours in a kiss both tender and urgent. He used the kiss to roll you to your side with your back towards him. Harry pulled off the sweater off your body and pull the straps of your bralette off your shoulders, exposing more skin for his lips to capture.
Harry hands came down to your pants as his lips trailed down to your neck, each kiss a lingering, deliberate caress that sent shivers down your spine. As his mouth found the sensitive spot just below your ear, he paused, letting his lips brush lightly over your pulse point before his right hand found its way into your underwear.
“Try to stay quiet, yeah?” As his fingers started playing with you, touching your most intimate spots. His knee came between your legs, spreading them more and allowing him to explore more of you.
Harry left arm went under her head, for you to rest your head against his bicep while he had his way with you. You bit your lips, arching your hips towards his hand just as his fingers entered you. A rush of pleasure coursed through you, mingling with a cascade of nerves that made your heart race.
“God. You are so wet, pup” He groaned as he tried his best to contain himself. Harry left hand came down to cover your mouth as your moans got louder. “You are doing so good, baby”, he mumbled, his arms tightening around you.
“For the love of fuck” you gasped as you came undone on his fingers. It was hot, you were both still nuzzled in the sleeping bag. Just as you unzipped the sleeping bag and sat up, you caught Harry sucking the same two fingers that had been in you a second ago.
“Come here” Harry commanded as he slipped off his joggers and boxers. It was a sight that she hoped to never forget. The muscles of his abdomen flexed proof that he spent his diligent time at the gym. His erection stood tall and proudly inviting you to ride him.
You slipped off your pants and underwear. Harry hands gripped your waist tightly and guided you down on to him. The pleasure was instant as he stretched you out. Harry’s fingers gripped you tightly, holding you still for a second as you both adjusted to the sensation.
His chest rose and fell with rapid breaths as his head was thrown back.
“Show me how much you missed me” You said to him which only ignited the fire within him. His hands guided your hips, as you both tried to find the perfect rhythm to drive you off the edge.
“Look at you. So fuckin’ perfect just f’me” Your words only ignited the fire within him, a spark that quickly grew into an all-consuming blaze.
His hands firmly guided your hips, every movement deliberate and driven by an intense desire to bring you both to the peak of ecstasy. The sensation of his strong hands on your skin, the way he moved with you, sent waves of pleasure rippling through your body. You both sought the perfect rhythm, each thrust and shift in sync, the friction and pressure building with every passing second.
“Oh, baby… you are so tight” he moaned, Harry’s grip tightened on your waist, his fingernails digging into your skin. Your thrust and grinding became sloppier and soon enough both of you were moaning. You clenched around him as Harry lifted his hips from the ground as you both came undone.
You laid down on his chest with him still in you. It was comforting, having him in you. Harry’s hands came up and brushed your sweaty hair back.
“You aren’t going to disappear now, are you?” You asked as he drew patterns on your sweaty back.
“I am not going anywhere”.
#harry#harrystyles#harry imagine#harry imagines#harry styles imagine#harry styles imagines#harry fanfic#harry fic#harry fanfiction#harry styles fanfic#harry styles fic#harry styles fanfiction#harry blurb#harry angst#harry smut#harry fluff#harry dabble#harry trope#harry styles angst#harry styles blurb#harry styles smut#harry styles dabble#harry styles trope#harry styles fluff#harry one shot#harry styles one shot#harry x you#harry x reader#harry x y/n#harry styles x you
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~𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐩𝐲 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝐒𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭~ Part 3
Part 3 of The Spy Master's Secret Find more ACOTAR works here! Summary: The Inner Circle meets the most important person in Azriel's life. Warnings: Lia rewrites what the Carranam bond is to fit her own fantasy, (Mention of) Bad injuries and domestic abuse, (Mention of) Azriel's dad 🤢, Inner Circle loves to STAY in Azriel's business, I actually write Rhys as not an asshole in this one
“My Carranam.” The Spy Master replied.
No one was given time to think, much less respond, before Azriel had commanded everyone to leave the room. They would have been more reluctant to do so, the desire to know what the hell he meant was painful, had the serious look on the strange female’s face, and the look of despair on Azriel’s, had given them the impression this conversation was better left between the two.
Out in the hallway, Cassian finally voiced his concern,
“Should we have left him alone with whoever that was? He isn’t in any state to be fighting back should he ne-”
Amren scoffed at the question. “I’d trust her with him far more than you all.”
“What do you mean? Do you know her?” Elain asked.
“No, but he is her Carranam. You all might not know the significance of such a bond- I don’t even know much about it myself, but I know enough to believe there is no one who would protect and cherish him more.” There was a sort of amazement and respect in Amren’s eyes that told the rest of them that she was right. Gave them enough information to walk away from the bedroom, content on letting Azriel come to them when he was ready.
—
The Inner Circle was no longer content waiting for their Spy Master to make an appearance. All had been sitting at the dining table for what must have been millenia, plates full with no appetite as millions of questions swarmed their heads. Amren had seemingly been the only one to have any idea what any of this could have meant, but the second she got the chance, she disappeared so she wouldn’t be bothered with questions about something that had nothing to do with her.
Finally, Nesta broke the silence.
“Do you think he is purposefully trying to torture us by taking forever?” She asked, eyeing the very apparent shadows in the corner that had been slithering to and from the room since they had all sat down. “Or do you think she is-”
“It would be my fault Azriel was occupied for a bit.” The strange fae announced as she entered the room, Azriel by her side with a slight limp. The two looked… strange together, but also so right. White feathered wings stood tall behind the female, nicely contrasting Azriel’s leathery Illyrian ones. Where he was crowned in darkness and shadows, she seemed to have bathed in light. It should have contrasted each other terribly, but their stark differences only seemed to compliment the other.
It also didn’t escape anyone’s notice how their friend looked thousands of times better than he did just hours earlier.
He was still clearly injured, but far from the edge of death he teetered on these past few days.
“How? Madja could only do so much for him.” Rhysand asked, astonished at how well his brother looked.
She helped him into his seat before taking the empty one next to him. Even as they got comfortable, her hand never left his arm, finding comfort in his touch after days of agony and helplessness.
“Junia is a healer. The best Dawn has to offer.” Azriel said, the pride clear in his voice. It made sense that she- Junia had been from Dawn. A Peregryn and an Illyrian, two lesser fae known for their warrior skills and inherent desire for the skies.
“I am not as skilled as Madja, but it's easier to heal when you know exactly what is wrong, exactly what hurts.” Junia said, rolling her eyes at Azriel’s shameless bragging.
She let out a deep and rich laugh as she looked at everyone’s faces, all pained by the many questions swirling around in there. Feyre noted that she hadn’t heard such a joyous laugh since Azriel had done the same when Elain had gifted him medicine for all the headaches the Inner Circle gave him.
Clearly, whatever bond they had between them was deep.
“You better introduce me, put them out of their misery.” She teased Az, who had been too caught up relishing her laugh, after a very long and rough berating it was nice to see her not seconds away from tearing out his wings.
“R-right. Uh- this is my- well this is-” Azriel stammered.
“Mother above Az, don’t hurt yourself," Cassian amused.
Azriel closed his mouth as he blushed, unsure of how to go about this.
“My name is Junia. As the brooding bat said, I am his Carranam.” Junia answered, side eyeing Azriel.
Keep it together, Az. It's a little pathetic.
Azriel responded to her teasing look with a glare. We haven’t had to tell anyone about this in a while. Why don’t you try to explain it to these idiots if you are so clever.
Rhysand noticed the silent conversation going on between them.
“You can converse like Daemati? Is that your ability?” The High Lord asked her.
They both hesitated, realizing they didn’t really know how their so-called “telepathy” worked.
“No- or I don’t believe so at least. When you communicate with someone, you are doing so verbally, even if not aloud, correct? I don’t hear Azriel’s voice in my head, I just feel what he is trying to tell me, if that makes sense.”
“Like a mating bond?” Feyre questioned.
“Also no. It's not our feelings that are conveyed solely, we can gather more specific meaning from it. Yes, Junia would feel I was not excited for this conversation, but she would also know I was offering her one last chance to leave, should she also not want to deal with all of your… strong personalities.” Azriel responded, looking at Junia. He really didn’t want to have this conversation with his family.
She laughed at his desperation which, while very clear to her, she knew the Inner Circle was none the wiser to the just how far Azriel was willing to go to leave this table. She could see him coming up with escape routes in his head as he picked up his wine glass.
“Oh you poor delicate flower,” She teased.
Unfortunately, they all still noticed the blush that once again appeared on Az’s face, laughing at their scary brother, head tortured of the Night Court, being compared to a ‘delicate flower’.
Downing the rest of his glass, Azriel finally explained.
“A carranam bond isn’t like a mating bond. It comes from an old phrase, A Soul Friend. It gives Junia and I the ability to channel each other's powers, even make them stronger when we are together. Like you noticed, we have a different, more intimate way of communicating, far stronger than Daemati and mates can.”
“How the hell has no one else here heard of this bond?” Nesta asked, skeptical. Seems like something a group of people as obsessed with the mating bond would know about.
“It is rare, extremely so. There are also many… vulnerabilities that come with a bond such as this. To find your carranam is hard enough, most will never be born with one. But to accept such a bond is dangerous. And unfortunately there have been instances of others abusing such a gift. Tying their carranam up to reap their abilities, taking so much from them that both end up going insane. It became illegal in many places and eventually was forgotten by our world.” Junia answered.
“How did you find out what you guys had?” Feyre jumped in.
While this was Junia’s story as much as Azriel’s, she hesitated. Because there was another factor to that story, and she didn’t believe she was the one who should talk about it first.
Another glance between the two, a question asked. Azriel answered it by speaking up, “Junia is from Dawn. After my… mother was released- rescued from my father’s abuse, she wasn’t in wonderful shape. Fortunately, Rhys, Cassian, and myself found a place created by High Lord Thesan’s mother that offered aid to those escaping similar situations, Rosehall. That is where Junia worked as head healer. She helped my mother a lot throughout the years.” Such admiration and gratitude in his voice made several people at the table start to tear up.
Everyone was quiet. While Rhysand, Cassian, and Mor knew the story of Azriel’s mother being sent to Rosehall, they hadn’t known about Junia, just about the healer Az’s mother had gotten along with-
“You are the friend of his mother’s he sends gifts to every Solstice?” Mor asked, having been approached by Azriel for help with buying said gifts many times in the past.
“I thought you picked those gifts out yourself? You didn’t tell me Mor did all the work.” Junia turned to Az.
“I do pick them out, you just have peculiar taste. I have needed her help locating shops to buy such things before. That's it.” Az defended.
I certainly do have peculiar taste she silently said to Az who, again, blushed at the double entendre.
He quickly cleared his throat, “A few years after my mother had entered her care, while I was visiting, there was an attack on Rosehall. It was one of the families of a newer resident enacting revenge for escaping abuse. When many were hurt or dying… or dead, the two of us the only ones available to help, this bond had snapped out because of that desperation. It was new but it felt like it had always been there. We both leaned into the feeling and fortunately it didn’t end terribly. Suddenly, my shadows were able to start healing, and were able to talk to Junia, giving her any info on people who needed her help that she couldn’t see.”
Everyone was astonished at such a story. So different but also so similar to the mating bond.
“Since then we have been each others’ confidants. While we don’t live particularly close, shadow walking gives me the ability to come to him whenever, and vice versa. Plus the connection is always there, even miles upon miles apart.” Junia answered.
“Why keep it a secret?” Cassian questioned, knowing how much a connection like this would matter to Az, but confused because wouldn’t he want his family to know about him having such a bond?
“I am not exactly without enemies, Cas. I couldn’t have a possibility of someone coming after her because of me.” The sound of raw pain in his voice let his family know that this wasn’t something that was simply a fear.
Someone had gone after her in revenge.
“Your secret is safe with us. You are safe with us. Should you need anything, just say the word.” Rhysand offered.
The two carranam looked at each other. “After I spent a while yelling at Azriel for scaring me half to death multiple times in the past few days. We decided that maybe it was best I… step back from Rosehall.” Junia explained, sadness present in her tone as she talked about leaving the place that had been her sole purpose for her entire life. “I have healers on my staff that deserve the promotion, including Azriel’s mother, who has used her experiences to really become a confidant and friend to so many of our residents.”
Azriel’s throat bobbed at the mention of just how much his mom had healed and helped since she escaped his father.
Excitement filled the room at the possibility of adding another to their family. But Junia was still painfully aware of just how many questions everyone had.
“Alright, now that all the nitty gritty is out of the way, you can all begin your interrogation,” she teased.
All at once, tens of questions left everyone’s mouth. Not a single one able to be distinguished over the rest.
Azriel’s hand reached down to hold Junia’s, squeezing her while seeming to say I told you we should have escaped while we could.
They both downed their wine glasses while they waited for the Inner Circle to tire themselves out.
A/N: Originally, this was the end. But I think I created so much backstory and also fell too much in love with Junia not to add more. So please let me know if you'd like more to this series! (And what you’d like to see)
Taglist: @bunnyred-blog1 @that-one-bibliophole @fuckingsimp4azriel @daughterofthemoons-stuff @minaaminaa8 @lilah-asteria @azrielswhore @maksamillion
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the compression shirt conundrum ⟡ kmg
wc: 1017 | pair: bf!mingyu x gn!reader | genre: fluff, slight cringe maybe, suggestive | tags: grey sweatpants and compression shirt, some swearing, reader becomes a zombie for mingyu pp, giggly!mingyu, just teeth rotting cuteness, reader is significantly smaller, mingyu is called a giant, pet names: honey, baby, babe, angel
summary: when mingyu comes home wearing a compression shirt and sweatpants, you no longer have any thoughts in your brain and become a zombie for him
authors note: the day we see mingyu in a compression shirt, god help us all… this is unedited, might be trash lmk
It was a quiet night in. You had a movie on, your place was clean, dishes washed, and your super hot boyfriend was on his way home any minute now with takeaway for dinner.
Mingyu had texted you that he was craving army stew and asked if you wanted anything from your go to restaurant. Sessions at the gym often caused him to develop a massive appetite afterwards.
“Honeyyy, I’m hommeee,” Mingyu’s rang.
“Hey baby— Oh. My. God.“
Your boyfriend looked at you confused. From where he stood, you were gaping at him, and somehow melting into the couch? He swapped his gym shoes for his house slippers and attentatively approached you.
“What’s… What’s going on? I brought food.”
“Who needs food when I’ve got a Mingyu buffet.” Your eyes raked up and down your boyfriend countless times. After such a smooth sailing night, you finally encountered your first problem.
Mingyu was wearing grey sweatpants.
And a black compression shirt.
A while back you told him that you wanted to see him in this combination. You knew he’d be hot as hell, however this was better than you ever expected.
It was just a plain, solid colored long sleeved shirt that was skintight. Every valley and ridge of muscles were clearly defined. You could feel your mouth water.
“Woah, woah, woah! I’ve got food here!” Mingyu whined as you rushed up to him while greedily running your fingers all over his body. You had half the mind to smash your face inbetween his pectorals.
Mingyu escaped your clutches as he headed straight to the kitchen, the hunger in his stomach making itself more apparent by the minute. He was about to pass out from starvation. His Hoshi-hyung really put him and the boys to work.
You were right behind him, following him around the kitchen as he went to plate up the food for the two of you. Your gaze never left his body. Was hypnosis by Underarmour clothing a thing? You were about to climb this man like a tree.
“B-b-baby?” He stuttered, looking at you with concern. You looked like a zombie.
You appeared to be a perfectly alive and healthy human. However, Mingyu observed your raised arms, reaching for him; and noted that you didn’t appear to have any thoughts in your head. All that was needed left was for you to moan ‘brains’ repeatedly.
“Must… Suck dick,” you said in a deep gravelly tone, putting on your best zombie impression. “Must… Suck dick.”
Mingyu let out a squawk of laughter as he backed away from you. His ears bloomed red. His toothy grin almost had you breaking character, but no! You were dedicated.
“I’m flattered that you think I look good, but an ‘omigosh babe, you look really hot’ would be just fine. This is… Wild.” Mingyu was slowly exiting the kitchen, and you were following him with slow steps.
He didn’t expect the clothes to have this much of an effect on you.
Was this what it was like to be you when you wore lingerie?
“No thought in brain, only Mingyu. Mingyuuu,” you chanted.
Mingyu managed to dodge a swipe you made at him. “Who are you? Where’s my angel gone? Give her back to me!”
“Right here, just give me them babies,” you replied with your zombie voice. Mingyu giggled.
He took a step backwards, and then another. You copied him but at a slower pace. With a final step backwards, Mingyu spun on his heel and dashed around the corner and into the hallway.
He dived into one of the rooms before you could even take another step. He had disappeared in an instant.
You wanted to laugh. With how small your apartment was, it was a proven fact that it would be impossible for him to successfully hide.
You ‘became’ your human self again and strolled towards the general direction your lover ran.
“Oh Mingyu… Come out, come out, wherever you are…”
Mingyu cupped his face with his hands, reducing any chances of you hearing him breathe. He couldn’t laugh, but you made him giddy like a child. He was a grown man playing and seek after all.
All that could be heard in the house was the movie that was still playing on the TV, and the light scuffs of your house slippers against the floor.
You finally reached the bedroom you shared with Mingyu at the end of the hallway. Little did you know, he was hiding behind the door. Not hiding, but ready to attack.
You pouted, looking around. “Baby? I’m not a zombie anymore. Just horny.”
As soon as you made it all the way into the room, the door slammed behind you. Your breath was stolen when a giant shadow grabbed you and pulled you onto the bed.
You found yourself on your back, caged in by Mingyu. He had a hand on either side of your head on the mattress, and a knee on the edge of it between your legs.
“It’s just a pair of pants and a shirt,” Mingyu murmured as he bent his head to kiss your cheek.
His nose traced patterns on your face, heading down towards your neck to take in your familiar scent. He loved when you wore this fragrance.
“Just a pair of pants and a shirt?!” You parroted in offence. You threw your arms around his neck. “It is more than that. It is the masculine version of lacey lingerie! It is the sexiest, sluttiest outfit you could put on. You look sexy as fuck!”
Mingyu blushed at your words with a very, very shy smile on his face. He knew that he was attractive, but to have you enthusiastically praise his appearance made him proud of the effort he put in at the gym. Your opinion of him mattered most.
He kissed your head. “Thank you baby.”
“Kim Mingyu, if you don’t lay on this bed and let me worship your body I swear on your dog’s life…”
“Not if I worship you first. Who told you these fluffy shorts are my weakness?”
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I was at the national maritime museum today and I feel like we as a fandom are sleeping on just how many bonkers victorian fads (pre-expedition) Fitzjames would buy into with his full chest and how much situational comedy it could cause in fix-it aus where they make it back to London in one piece.
Just to give examples– Lord Nelson and his death were so monumental in public consciousness, that a ton of commemorative plates, mugs, trinkets and other memorabilia were created to celebrate him, both before and after his death.
(Yeah, that's a wholeass clock depicting his death).
I know that was a while ago by the 1840s but Brits love Nelson and tell me JFJ does not own at least one such cup or a small and tacky statue perhaps, to prove to everyone how English and patriotic he is. I want fitzier to move in together, only for Francis to find 5 of these while unboxing James’s belongings from before the expedition.
Similarly, long before Nelson's death, when he won that battle in the Nile– well read for yourself:
Once again, this is a good 40 years ago so I'm not saying James would have done this himself BUT my point is that Brits of that era were unhinged in so many ways as compared to our sensibilities. Whatever equivalent trend was going on in the 1840s ought to be researched, because you know our girl would be doing it with his full chest. The possibilities are endless. We have a duty to embrace them.
Apparently, there was also quite the appetite in the public consciousness for arctic/polar expeditions, including, once again, commemorative plates, which I humbly think should feature more prominently in post-canon fix it fics.
LASTLY this painting of Nelson fighting a polar bear took me out. Petition for post-canon fitzier to come across it in some hall or museum and absolutely lose it lmao
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Part III
Word count: 3900+
Warnings: a lot of anxiety and panic attacks (our reader have a tough time adjusting to the new life), also little smut(ish)
Autumn themed divider by tsunami-of-tears
Part II | Part IV
The morning found you curled up in the ottoman, peacefully sleeping. A knock sounded on the double doors and you jolted up looking around the unfamiliar room. As your brain got rid of the heavy fog of the sleep, all memories of the last day popped out and you sighed heavily. Your gaze fell to the bed and you immediately sat up, eyes wide. The bed was made, no one slept in it. You quickly checked up your body. And apparently you were just as untouched as that bed. You were confused as well as relieved. You didn't understand. How was it possible? You and your husband were supposed to do.. something. Did he not come? Or he came in, found you sleeping and left? Angry? And where did he sleep?
Another knock sounded, snapping you out of your thoughts before you started spiraling. You weren't sure what to do, so you went and opened the doors a little. Same maids were waiting there and as last night bowed.
"Good morning, my lady. We came to help you to prepare."
"Prepare? For what?"
They looked at each other with raised brows. "For the day, madame," the other one answered.
Blushing you stepped back letting them in and they immediately set to work. Even if they noticed the untouched bed, they didn't show any signs nor commented it. While you were getting dressed, servants brought breakfast to that small dinning table you saw last night. You bit on your lower lip when you saw only one plate.
"What about.. my husband?"
"His Lordship has already eaten. He woke up early in the morning and currently is at the meeting," one of the maids answered with a light nod to the doors opposite of yours. After that they all left leaving you to eat alone.
You were sitting there, staring at the food while it stared back at you. You had no appetite. Again and again you replayed every minute of the wedding ceremony and the party, looking for any serious mistake you'd done. You certainly did something otherwise he would have come last night. You thought that you were on quite good terms with your husband based on the fact that you were secretly holding hands most of the last evening.
This was bad, so bad. It was a catastrophe. Your father had to already know about everything, he always did. He was certainly so furious. You dreaded to meet him. Moreover if your husband decided to send you back, you definitely wouldn't live to see another day. Father would kill you right away before you even left this place. He didn't need someone as useless as you. There was no way he would forgive you. It wasn't in his nature. High Lord was the highest offer you could get. There was nothing better than that. Your father wouldn't accept any lower offer now.
You couldn't breathe. Panic gripped your insides, suffocating you. If you were back home, you would crawl to the space between your bed and the wall. It was so narrow that you hardly fitted in, but you felt safe there. You used to spend there even whole night after beating or when you were scared like now, you simply hid there and waited until the feeling faded away.
When walls started to close in on you, you left the food as it was and closed yourself in the bedroom, desperately looking for some corner where you could hide. The room was too spacious, too airy for you. It only made things worse. After searching in vain, you tried the bathroom with the same result and at last the closet. There in the back of the room, you found a narrow dark place between some drawer cabinet and the wall. You squeezed in there and sitting down on the floor pulled your knees to the chest as tightly as you could. Finally you could breathe in a small sip of the air, the pressure on your chest gradually eased. The tears began rolling down your cheeks and you sobbed until at some point you passed out from exhaustion.
"So this is where you've been hiding this whole time?"
A deep voice spoke, waking you up. In the distance you heard raindrops drumming on the windows and the air smelled of rain, smoke and apples roasted on fire. You didn't dare to look up, instead you curled up into yourself even more.
"Everyone out there is looking for you since lunch."
"I'm so sorry," you muttered into your knees.
The male sighed heavily. He seemed to be pissed off. "Can you explain me what in the bottomless depths of the Cauldron you're doing here?"
You pressed even harder against the wall, trying to get as far from him as you could. This was it. He had enough of you and there was no witness, so he could freely act upon it.
"I'm so sorry," you sobbed. You knew that no matter what you said, it wouldn't work. It never worked. Yet you couldn't stop apologising, still hoping it could ease the intended punishment.
You heard his footsteps muffled by the carpet as he approached you and got ready.
"I apologise, Y/N" he murmured and his fingers lightly touched your elbow. The smell of smoke was replaced by spicy cinnamon. "I didn't mean... I'm not angry at you. I was just worried sick, thinking that... Ah, it doesn't matter." He struggled with his words.
When you didn't move, he groaned and continued.
"Maids came to report that you are missing as soon as the meeting was over. They said that you looked pale in the morning and that you didn't sleep in the bed nor eat. They thought you went to take a nap. Just imagine how surprised they were when they came to wake you up for lunch and couldn't find you."
His fingers traveled down your forearm to your hand and gently squeezed it. Iciness of his strict deep voice melted, replaced by warmth and tenderness. "What happened? Why are you hiding here?"
You dared to peek at him. Your husband was crouching in front of you, his amber eyes watching you closely. He really didn't seem to be angry, just tired.
"I'm sorry to have caused you worry," you little bit straightened up, still avoiding his eyes.
He gently pulled on your hand. "What happened? You can talk to me. Someone hurt you? Or told you something you didn't like?"
"Are.. are you going to send me back?"
"Nope," Eris chuckled, evidently amused by your silly question. The sound was rich and kind of cute. Your heart did a strange thing. He seemed to be more relaxed than the last night at the party. "Last time I checked on this matter, your father signed that he will never even try to contact you and left with rather a rich reward."
You gaped at him in disbelieve. Your head went completely silent.
"It's true. You will either stay here or call Rhysand to come to pick you up, but you won't go back to your family."
"Thank you, my lord," you smiled genuinely, relief spreading in your chest.
"There you are. Finally smiling," he looked over his shoulder. "I think we should go out and tell everyone that you are fine. I guess they are still looking for you. What do you think?"
You flushed, feeling ashamed. "I'm sorry for causing the troubles."
"It's fine," he waved his hand and helped you to stand up. "At least they are finally doing something meaningful."
Eris left you in the sitting room between your bedrooms and went to stop the search. While he was gone, some servants with trays of steaming food marched in and set it on the table. They again prepared only one plate. Disappointed you looked at heavy double doors with carved ornaments that you hadn't noticed before. You still hoped he would come back.
After a moment the door swung open and one of the maids walked in.
"His Lordship apologizes, but he had to return to his duties," she announced.
Sad that after all he wouldn't come back, you sat down and let servants serve you the meal. Still having no appetite, you at least ate a bit of every dish of the late lunch that they presented you and when you were done they all left except of that one maid. She sat down on small stool in the corner of the room, took out something from under her apron and started embroidering. Your husband apparently made sure that you weren't left alone again.
For a while you watched her dancing hand with a needle and then you moved to a bench under the window, looking out into the drenched garden half hidden in the mist. Despite all the colours, it was quite a melancholic sight yet comforting. It perfectly matched your mood. You watched the colourful flowers and trees until they plunged into darkness.
The dinner went just like the lunch. Servants brought in food and you ate alone. Soon after you were done, other maids came in and ran a bath for you. The other one who spent the afternoon looking after you, meanwhile left. Just as the previous night, they washed you properly, massaged bath oils into your skin and hair, and helped you prepare for the bed. After they were done and cleaned the bathroom, they left.
With heavy heart you took a seat in the very same ottoman and watching the doors, waited. Your bedroom and the sitting room next door were so quiet that you heard the faint ticking of the clock and crackling fire from behind the closed thick doors. Eventually that sounds lulled you to sleep.
Later that night you jolted up, scared by a tremendous crash of thunder. Your heart leaped to your throat. Since you were child, you were scared of storms, its wild sounds echoed through the stone halls even deep under the mountain. However, it was nothing compared to this.
Another thunder rumbled through the sky. You jumped up with a small scream, pressing against the wall on the opposite side of the room, covering your ears with hands. You started pacing back and forth, your body trembled. Opening door of the closet you ran to your new-found safe place, hoping you could weather the storm there, but the sounds of thunder followed you even there.
A particularly bright bolt of lightening crossed the sky, closely followed by sound so strong that the walls shook. That was the last straw and you fled to the sitting room and to the double doors on the opposite side. You hesitated with a hand only inches from the smooth surface of the oak door. Another thunder rumbled around you and your hand met the cold surface before you could change your mind.
Surprisingly, the doors opened right away as if he waited with hand on doorknob. Your husband stood there with messy red hair that had a copper hue in the light of the fire from the hearth. Shirtless, sweatpants hanging low on his hips, he blinked down at you with sleepy eyes. If you weren't so scared, you would stop to take a proper look and blush fiercely.
However, thunder struck again and you leaped to his arms, hiding your face at his muscular chest, your hands looking for something to grip on.
"What..?" he grumbled and stepped back, eyes widely open. His big hands landed on your shoulders, trying to push you away.
The lightning bolt enlightened the room, all decorations rattled and you cried out, clinging to him with arms wrapped around his waist. His brows raised in shock.
The beats of his heart under your face grew stronger and louder than the storm and you opened your eyes sharply, suddenly realizing what you were doing. Your breasts were pressed against his stomach. There was no way he didn't feel them through the thin material of your nightgown. You didn't even want to think about it. With bowed head and gaze focused on the floor you retreated a few steps back, blushing and thanking the Mother that the lights were turned off.
"I'm so-sorry, my lord, I didn't-" your sentence ended with a scream as decorations in the room rattled again.
"You are scared. Of the storm," he stated baffled. Only then his sight fell to your chest and everything bellow it and his cheeks turned pink. He held his breath.
"I'm sorry I woke you up, my lord," you said much calmer than you really felt, still looking at his bare feet.
"No, it's fine." He cleared his throat looking somewhere above your head.
With another too loud thunder you ducked with hands on your ears. Eris stepped closer, arms stretched to you, but then he changed his mind and let them fall back to his sides.
"Ehm.. What should we do?" he muttered under his nose.
"Do-do you want to come in?" he offered gesturing to his room.
"I-I think I could."
He stepped aside, making space for you. Without touching him again you slipped in. His room was just like yours, everything, including even the colours of sheets, was the same. The only difference was that instead of the vanity there was a desk in the corner. Left side of the bed was a mess, the rest was untouched. No personal stuff, favourite paintings, nothing.
Eris watched you with interest as your eyes wandered around his bedroom. Seeing you scantily clad in his private room where he didn't even allow the servants to come clean, was doing something with him. He shook head, exhaling heavily through nose.
"Sit down," he waved to the ottomans. Meanwhile he touched a teapot on the coffee table. It took only a minute and small puffs of steam began to rise from it. He filled one mug and handed it to you. Then he sat in the other one with own cup of tea in hand.
You looked at the windows, wondering whether the storm was already over, because it had been quiet for quite some time. How surprised you were to see the lightening flashing behind the curtains.
"It's just magic. I'm quite light sleeper and don't want to be disturbed," he explained with a small smile.
You lowered your eyes guilty and squeezed the mug. "I'm so sorry for disturbing you, my-"
"Eris," he interrupted you with narrowed eyes and tilted head to the side. One of his brows raised up. "You keep calling me 'my lord'. But we are married couple now and I'm not your...owner." He grimaced at the word. "Call me just Eris. And as I said before, it's fine."
You nodded and sipped the warm tea. You both fell silent unsure of what to say.
The realisation that it's night and you were alone with your husband in the room with bed, hit you suddenly and your heartbeat speeded up. You fought with your feelings and the urgent need to take a look at him, a proper look, until you couldn't resist it anymore. You wanted to get to know him better. Out of all the males you'd ever met, he was the least scary one and the fact that despite everything, he hadn't tried to hurt yet, encouraged you.
You started with his hands. Shyly you looked up at his long, elegant fingers embracing the cup. You quite liked them, their shape and how they felt on your skin. You didn't even need to focus to recall the feeling when they were entwined with yours. Your gaze of its own accord moved up the strong cords of muscles to nicely sculpted biceps.
The bedroom was rather dark, only one small light was on on the bedside table. Yet it provided enough light for you to involuntarily notice small freckles on his shoulders. There were dozens of them and you caught yourself thinking that you would like to try to count them. Your cheeks heated once again, but it didn't stop you.
Next your gaze shifted to the largest display of thoroughly shaped flesh and tight skin, to his chest. You knew nothing about these things, yet you had to admit that it was very nice chest. Even just simply looking from the distance, did funny things with your body and you felt tingling in your lower belly. If you remembered it correctly, his skin felt smooth and hot under your face, his flesh soft and firm at the same time. Dusted with a few lovely freckles, it rose and fell with quite rapid breaths.
Eris wasn't bulky, rather lean, but still so strong. A warrior.
You wanted to continue down to his stomach where you noticed a lot of interesting looking shadows you'd like to study closely, but it felt inappropriate. Not that what you were doing right now wasn't, but you couldn't stop yourself. You were always scared to properly look at people, to see them and the details of their faces. With your husband it was different, as if something was calling you, inviting you to take a look.
Wanting to see his handsome face again, to explore it and commit it to your memory, your eyes traveled up over the column of his neck to his chin. His Adam apple bobbed as he swallowed, arteries pulsed in wild rhythm that matched yours.
He was perfectly shaved, there didn't seem to be a single hair left out on his face. His lips in a nice shade of pink were full, the lower lip fuller than the upper one, and slightly parted. You knew that they not only seemed to be but really were soft. You still could feel their touch on yours and to be honest, you'd like to taste them again. Did they still taste of honey and alcohol or could you taste herbs now? You'd really like to get the answer. His lips quirked into a boyish grin and stayed like that.
Your gaze skimmed over freckles on his high cheeks and straight nose. Damn, you wanted to count them so badly now. Would you ever get a chance to try it? At least once and you'd never ask for more.
Lost in that beauty and your imagination, your gaze wandered to his eyes partly hidden under slightly furrowed arches of brows, and their colour immediately caught your attention. They seemed to shine in the dimly lit room, flames dancing in them. His gaze bore into you with such intensity that you felt wetness gathering between your legs. You turned into a panting mess, suddenly feeling uncomfortably hot in your own skin.
"What are you doing?" His deep, hoarse voice snapped you from trans and you blinked.
While you were admiring him, the air in the room grew thicker, strong scents middling together.
"I-.." You didn't know what to say, mouth completely dry, too ashamed of your shameless behaviour. You shouldn't behave like this, it didn't suit a lady.
His grin widened. "Do you like what you see?" your husband teased you.
"I-.." you shifted uncomfortably, your eyes moved to his lips, then to his chest and back up to those marvellous eyes.
"You what, Y/N? You can be honest with me."
You inhaled sharply, your face flushed with even more shame. "Yes, I like it, m-"
"Tsk tsk tsk. I think I told you to call me by my name."
"I like it, Eris," you murmured.
His eyes closed briefly and he exhaled deeply, making a strange noise. It sounded like a growl.
"Say it again. My name," he specified when you gave him questioning look.
You hesitated for a moment. There was something about him that made your pulse skyrocket. He was dangerous predator, able to kill with a single thought, but strangely, you wouldn't mind to be his prey. You didn't know him at all, yet you felt a connection between the two of you. And you longed to explore it more, to see what he was capable of.
"Eris," you whispered into silence between you.
Frowning with closed eyes he made the same noise. One second he was sitting in ottoman with mug in hand, the next one both mugs were left on the table and he was kneeling next to you. Even on his knees he was so tall that his eyes were level with yours. Those long fingers that fascinated you moments ago, found yours, entwining with them while his fiery eyes burned your body and soul in the most pleasant way. Room felt so hot suddenly that you had the urge to open the windows, get rid of any clothing you had on you and expose your bare skin to a cooling rain.
"Y/N," he groaned, his gaze slowly fell to your lips.
You were so attracted to him that it had to be result of some kind of spell. Not having enough strength to resist it anymore, you gave in. Still longing to taste his full lips you leaned in slightly. His eyes returned to yours, searching. Whatever he saw, it seemed to work. His softness brushed over your lips, tenderly pulling them into a kiss.
His lips were just like you remembered them, soft and sturdy at the same time, tasting like honey and tea he drank. You wondered where that sweet taste came from because there was no jar of honey in this room nor the tea was sweet. Deciding it had to be taste of him, you moaned.
Your lips parted briefly, but he was fast. His tongue slipped in with ease, hungrily exploring your mouth. You gasped at the new sensation. Everything was new to you. You were taught some theoretical basics, but never practised them.
His body pushed against yours until you were almost lying, hands on the back of your head and your waist navigating you. Thin material of you nightgown presented no barrier between your bodies. You felt him everywhere, but it wasn't enough. You needed more.
You reached for him, needing to feel his hot skin. As soon as the tips of your fingers lightly brushed over his shoulder, he abruptly pushed away, breaking the kiss.
He backed to the center of the room, hands running through thick red strands. All the warmth left together with him and you were left trembling, confused and lonely without his closeness.
Both of you were heaving heavily. He averted his fiery eyes, hand reaching for a handle. As if instantly remembering something, his hand dropped to his side.
"We should go to sleep. It's late. I have a lot of work to do, so I have to get up early."
Shirt appeared in his hands and he quickly put it on. "You can sleep here tonight."
Without looking at you again he climbed to the bed, waiting for you. You were desperately needing time to compose yourself, to understand what just happened, why your body betrayed you and reacted the way it did, but you couldn't keep him waiting. You slipped under the covers on the other side, lying on your back stiffly like a board.
Eris turned off the light, mirroring you. You were sure you wouldn't be able to even close your eyes with him so close. You were just laying there, nervously gazing at ceiling.
In the darkness his hand found yours, gently squeezing it. Within seconds pleasant warmth spread into your body and your eyelids grew heavy. Just before you slipped into a realm of dreams, Eris turned to his side, facing you and whispered lowly.
"Good night, love."
#ghost of love#gol#eris fanfic#eris vanserra#eris acotar#eris x reader#eris vandaddy#eris fic#eris x you#acotar#eris acosf#acosf#sarah j maas#acotar fanfiction
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┊┊┊✧ ⁺ ⁺╚══ Wind Pillar ╝
Premise: A life without the demon corps was just meaningless. Living with a heavy survivor guilt can really eat someone from the inside. That was until a weak light arrived in the most unexpected way possible, breathing life back into his lungs, making him feel needed once more.
Word Count: 5081
Warning: spoilers, the story takes place after the manga’s original timeline.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
Shinazugawa Sanemi was not the wind pillar anymore, he wasn’t Genya’s older brother anymore either. There was nobody left in this world that needed him.
After losing his family and dedicating his youth to demon hunting, losing the corps was the final blow for him.
Why was he the only one left?
He should have died if not with his family back in the day he should at least have died defending his brother’s life, Genya should be the one alive right now, not him.
What is the point of being alive when everything you care for was now gone?
He wasn’t particularly good at anything else besides demon hunting, getting a regular job and settling down was definitely not his style. He walked around the neighborhood he used to live in when his family was still alive, the thought of moving back into his old house crossed his mind, maybe do some renovations, hopefully he could drown in his good memories until time would come to give out his last breath.
But the house was now taken by an unknown family. A lot of people lost it all to demons and the destruction they brought with them, it wasn’t uncommon to see abandoned houses here and there, it made sense the house was deemed abandoned, they did leave to never come back.
He had nothing left, not even his old house.
Starting fresh could be encouraging to others, but for Sanemi it was torture.
None of the dojos he visited needed new instructors, majority of them were terrified by his looks alone, if a bunch of guys hitting each other for no apparent reason didn’t want him there what type of job was he supposed to get? It’s not like he was well mannered and literate like Tomioka or had a support network like Tanjiro. What’s the point of being the second strongest pillar if the demons were now all gone.
Sanemi’s lunch was now being given to stray ducks as he had no appetite whatsoever, feeding them was more productive than remaining in such a depressing head space, that’s when an orange rolled in between his feet. He didn’t think much of it, maybe someone dropped it while shopping, but then another orange came rolling next, and then three, making him look back in confusion.
A lone cart full of oranges was coming full speed down a hill with no one pushing it. He had to do something otherwise the villagers could get hurt, he saw small children playing around the area not long ago. Running towards it he was able to stop it before anything major happened, only a few oranges were lost, and the cart was still in good shape. A young woman came running in his direction panting for her life, “Thank you so much, good sir. My cart, it was so heavy, I lost control of it on my way home.”
Not trusting your current strength, he kept on holding the cart, still thinking of the kids running around and how exhausted you looked. “Were you heading down hill?”
“Not really, I was actually supposed to go up the hill behind us, but the cart was heavier than I expected, and it wouldn’t listen to me, so it rolled backwards.” Sanemi stared at said hill with a worrisome expression, that was no hill, that was a full-sized mountain. You were small, looked frail, pale even, little cuts and scars littering your hands. There was no way you could take the cart up that mountain, and it was not like he had anything else to do.
Somehow you reminded him of his mother and how they always needed to help her move heavy stuff around and reach tall places, wanting to help you came out naturally from his heart. “Lead the way.”
“Eh? It’s ok, don’t worry about me. I can take it!” your blushy surprised looking face caused him to scoff, turning the cart around and walking up the first hill. “Like hell you can. Now shut up and tell me where to go.”
“How can I tell you where to go if I shut up?” you were doing your best not to grin at his constipated looking scowl, but instead of teasing him further you just walked beside him in silence. The climb up to your house was steep, but he didn’t even sweat, before you noticed you were now at the entrance of your property, all over way too fast.
“Thank you, good sir. You can leave the cart there I will unload the oranges.” you ran into a small shed, bringing a cloth to wrap them up and bring them all inside. If the cart was heavy, the load was even worse. You couldn’t even lift them from the ground, causing Sanemi to heave a deep sigh. “Don’t you have a husband to help you? Or someone else like a father or brothers? There’s no way you can take all those fucking oranges inside unless you take one at a time and that would take a stupid amount of time.” He grabbed the load with one hand, swinging it over his shoulder like if it weighted nothing, waiting for you to open the door to your abode.
“I do not. My entire family was devoured by a wild beast while I was being treated in a hospice, far from here. Once I regained my strength back, they were all gone. My brother was the one who did all the heavy work around here, my mother and I would pick up the harvest and take care of the animals.” you had a pretty large farm, it wasn’t well tended now but it had several crops still growing and remains of what it used to be an area for livestock. “So, I do most of the work now that I’m alone.”
He knows how uncomfortable sympathetic comments are, so he doesn’t address the information gained, “Why do you even need so many oranges?” a loud thump could be heard as he set them on the kitchen floor, making the wooden floor tremble at the weight. “I was thinking of using them to make some marmalade and sell it at the markets, growing crops is harder than I thought, and I still need to eat, so had to figure something out.”
It was somewhat comforting for Sanemi hearing about the struggles of someone with a similar background. You both couldn’t protect your family, both had to worry about an uncertain future ahead of you. Both had things the other didn’t, but it felt good knowing he wasn’t the only one out there with similar problems.
“Do you like marmalade? I got some bread earlier, come sit down. Let me make you some tea, I still need to thank you for your kindness.” he nodded looking around for a place to sit down, the climb and the lack of food were starting to get to him, it sounded like a good idea.
He never thought making marmalade could be as complex, he had nothing better to do so he just looked at you from where he was sitting. Your hands were so small you needed both of them to stir the mix in the pot, it was amusing. The focus you were putting into making the treat, the tip of your tongue poking out passed your lips in concentration, it was all very eye catching. He’s always admire people that are good at cooking, always wanted to make delicious ohagi for himself, but he wasn’t the best with his hands unless it required brutish strength.
Once the marmalade was ready, you brought it to the small table in front of him, setting down a loaf of bread, a knife and two cups of steaming green tea.
Sanemi thinks back of the last time he was able to relax this way, sad thing really, he hadn’t ever since his mother left this world. Thinking of having afternoon tea without a worry in the world, it’s been over a decade since he had the luxury to do just that.
“Is it good? Do you like it? If you don’t, I can bring out something else.” the expectant look in your eyes made him contemplate what was in his mouth. It was sweet and very refreshing, he’s never had orange marmalade before so he couldn’t really compare it to any other, but he definitely didn’t hate it and wouldn’t mind eating some more. “It’s good, I’m sure it will sell well.” happy with his reply, you tried a bit yourself making mental notes of how to improve it even more.
Teacups were empty, plates clean, it was time for Sanemi to go back to wonder around town, maybe even try to find that one inn he heard about the day before. As he was getting up from his seat heavy rain came pouring down, a loud thunder making you jump. “When it rains this bad around here it takes a while for it to go away; would you like to stay for dinner? Um…sir?”
“Shinazugawa. Shinazugawa Sanemi.”
“Would you like to stay for dinner, Shinazugawa-san? I’m (Y/N) by the way.” he was starting to worry for your well being, you were deliberately letting an unknown man into your house and didn’t even know his name, that was not safe, even without demons around. “Tch, not like I have a choice.”
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
The rain was just not stopping, dinner was done for, and it was pitch black outside, the mountain’s treacherous paths were not places to wonder around in a stormy night like this one, “Shinazugawa-san, how about you stay for the night? You can stay in my brother’s room; I can even lend you some of his clothing so you can take a bath.”
A bath, it’s been days since he took one of those, an alluring offer indeed, but somehow the way you were taking the situation didn’t sit right in his stomach, rage was now bubbling inside his chest at your disregard for your own safety.
“Are you dumb or what? Do you not see me as a man? Hell, you do know you shouldn’t bring men you don’t know into your house, right? Specially not at night.” his angry outburst made you giggle, closing the front door shut to make a statement. “You sound like my brother, he used to say things like that to my mother. I do know you though, you’re the very kind young man that helped a woman in need without asking anything in return, I even know your name now.”
“So what? Is not like I couldn’t just do something to you now that it’s dark, it’s just the two of us here in the mountain, no one would hear if something was to happen, nobody would come even if you screamed for help like a damn pig. Don’t do stupid things like that even if you think you know someone, you don’t know a fucking thing about me.” he was shouting at this point, his fists shacking. He was really a kind man, all he wanted was for you to understand how evil the world out there could be, to others it could be overwhelming to have a figure like him shouting so angrily at them but you could see he was just worried.
“I won’t do it again, Shinazugawa-san, I promise. Now please come with me, I will show you where the bath is.” your attitude and gentle smile were infuriating. All he could think of was how his sweet mother got beaten down by his own father and the men he would bring home sometimes for drinks. How she could barely defend her children and would always ended up hurt, how she had no chance whatsoever to fight stronger men. You wouldn’t be able to defend yourself either, you needed some sense put in that head of yours before it was too late.
He pinned you against the bathroom wall, one of his muscular thighs going in between your legs, rendering you useless against his grip, he was glaring down at you in a strangely attractive way triggering many things within you, except fear, “See how easy it is for me if I wanted to hurt your ass? Take me seriously dammit, take every man fucking seriously, you can’t trust someone you don’t know so easily, it will get you killed.” he let go off your wrists roughly, wanting you to learn your lesson, but one of your hands reached for his, “You have a blister. Let me bring a bandage so we can clean it, it was probably the cart, it tends to do that.”
“No, stop. Why are you acting this way? Are you out of your mind? I could have assaulted you just now, open your eyes woman!”
“But you didn’t. You had more than one chance to do as you pleased with me, but you didn’t. Instead, you ate my food, laughed at my jokes, helped me when no one else did. You are a kind man Shinazugawa-san, wether you want to accept it or not. I’m not stupid, I wouldn’t invite someone over to my house if it could do me some harm.”
Sanemi was speechless. You didn’t consider him dangerous? He couldn’t even get a decent job because everyone would look at him like the killer he is. If there was someone dangerous out there it was him, he could kill you without even trying, in seconds, painfully, he was the second strongest in a chain of the strongest people humanity had to offer. There was something off with your view of the world.
“Now, stay still, I’m going to clean it.” his hand has never been held that way before, of course he’s had his wounds tended to, he’s always needing some patching up after his many battles, but your touch was different, it was so gentle, he could feel how you were really worried about him, about his tiny blister hurting with your touch, like if he was as frail as you were. “You gotta make sure the wound is properly cleaned before you apply bandages, look at yourself, all those scars…I bet they were all so painful…you need proper care if you don’t want them to get infected or leave traces. You tell me to take care of myself but wouldn’t look in a mirror first.”
Nobody talks to him like that, specially not females. The girls of the butterfly state were always scared of him and just looking their way would make them run away. The only active women in his life were his mother and sisters, he never had time to mess around with girls or to get his wounds properly taken care of, there were demons out there that needed to be killed and that’s all that mattered to him back then.
“Are you seriously not afraid of me?”
You looked up into his eyes, staring at him in disbelief, his tone was a lot tamer now you could hear the honest confusion lacing his words, “Why would I? You look tough, that’s true. But I am nobody to judge others. My brother also had many scars from taking care of the farm, even several of his toes were missing from when he stepped on a saw by accident, you’re not the only one around with a couple of fingers missing in this violent era. People used to say he was scary, all big and full of scars, skin tanned by the long hours of working in the fields, but he was a gentle man, always took great care of me and my mother. You strike me as the same type, you don’t feel like someone who would hurt the weak, you feel more like someone that protects them.”
Sanemi was left speechless once more as you left for him to enjoy his bath, you made sure the water was warm enough from the outside, blowing on the fire constantly until you heard him come out. He’s never been able to relax this much, he knew demons weren’t a threat anymore but that didn’t only mean he was unemployed, he didn’t think of what that meant fully until now. No demons meant less danger, meant being able to take his time to live life, to breathe, to relax. It was a strange feeling, not having to worry about someone bursting the door open and slaughtering the woman outside, but it was a good kind of strange.
He felt awfully relaxed that night and after years of nightmares, he was finally able to sleep peacefully.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
It’s been three days and the rain just wouldn’t stop. Sanemi had helped you covering the crops so they wouldn’t die out in the rain but there was no sign of it stopping any time soon. It was typhoon season, and it was heavily hitting you this year.
Not only did he help with the crops, but the roof also had holes in it which you two didn’t notice until you woke up to a flooded floor, so he repaired it. Your front door wasn’t safe enough for his liking, so he used his extra time to take care of that as well. He didn’t even notice time was moving this fast and days had gone by. It wasn’t as bad having something to do, keep your mind busy and your body active, regular people life wasn’t as boring and dreadful as he originally thought it was.
There was so much to do around the house that he wondered how you’ve managed to live up here in the mountain by yourself all this time. He got to learn you’ve been living here all alone for a couple of years and you have been doing all you can to not let the farm fall, your determination was admirable and made him question his own future.
“Shinazugawa-san, I enjoy thoroughly having you here, but isn’t your family going to worry? It’s kind of been a while now.” the back of his neck was strangely hot, your comment taking him off guard. He enjoyed the simplicity of the last few days comparing it to the rest of his life, he’s never been able to just sit down and listen to the rain fall on the roof sipping on a hot cup of tea, but he didn’t know you were enjoying it just as much.
“I don’t have a family. They also got killed by a wild beast long time ago, the only brother I had left passed this year, so no, nobody is going to worry about me not returning home, I don’t even have a home.” the stoic look on his face while he was retailing his life tragedy worried you, it’s something he should feel sad for, but he didn’t look sad, he looked angry, and you could understand that feeling, your family was taken away from you in the very same way.
“I bet your brother looked like you.” he wasn’t expecting that, usually people get uncomfortable with the thought of having to empathize with something they can’t understand and start apologizing, but you did go through the same, you stirred the subject around like he usually does when facing the same situation and he was grateful. “Hm, he had less scars than me, was taller, dark hair. But he did kind of look like me.”
“I bet he was kind too.”
“He was.” you were now pouring more tea in his cup, admiring the heavy rainfall through your window. “My brother didn’t look like me at all, he was way kinder, very smart, had the prettiest face I’ve ever seen with beautiful large eyes.” this made Sanemi look at your face, it was difficult to imagine a big muscly guy that looked anything close to the delicate tiny woman in front of him, but then again, he used to see his mother in Genya all the time. “Sounds a lot like you.” blood was flowing at full speed to your cheeks, decorating your lovely face with tinges of reds.
“Sometimes I wish I was the one the beast ate instead of my brother, the farm needs him, he was so good with animals and with the people at the market too, everyone loved him, he was the best of the two of us, it’s a shame really.”
Sanemi was lost in your face, the way your eyes watered at the memory of your brother, the way a soft defeated smile crept on your face signalizing guilt, he felt understood in a very deep level, strangely. “Same. I did all I could to protect my brother, I wanted him to live a normal life, get a wife, have some kids. But he ended up following me around and dying before me anyways. All my efforts were completely useless. I should have died, not him.” his fists were now shaking against the coffee table, veins popping all around his body as a rush of anger and despair rushed through him at the thought of his dying baby brother.
“I’m sure he just wanted to be with his beloved older brother. I used to follow mine around as well, wanted him to teach me how to get milk from the cow and got myself a kick to the face, turns out they get quite stressed if you’re too excited.” the absurdity of it all felt like getting some sort of medication for the illness that consumed his heart, like a serum being injected into his blood stream, cooling his anger down.
“Dumbass.” the sound of your laughter brought new air into the house, a house that is rather quiet all the time was now loud, and it smelled like a proper home.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
After two stormy days more, the sun was finally out. There was a lot of work to do in the fields to fix the damage caused by the storm. Sanemi started working on it as soon as he woke up without even asking you, and it took you both all day, something you thought would take an hour ended up extending throughout the entire day.
He was better at this than he thought he would, you even ended up planting some pumpkin seeds you got from the market a while back upon his suggestion of adding different types off crops. The front of the farm looked like a proper one afterwards bringing a powerful sense of completion to the both of you. It was hard work, but teamwork does really make a difference. And you two made a good team.
The sun was setting, all there was left to do was water the crops and prepare dinner, fresh rice already cooking in a pot inside the house. “Maybe you can grow some berries and do your marmalade using them instead of having to buy oranges, growing orange trees seems like a pain in the ass and there are wild berries in the forest, should be easy to find some and bring them here.” you were giving it serious thought, you’ve never thought about changing the ingredients, you were just replicating the treat your mother used to do for you and your brother when you were little. Being so lost in your head doing ingredient calculations and noting ideas for the recipe, you didn’t see the frog that was comfortably resting on your foot. Once you did though, panic filled your insides, you hated frogs and would always stay as far away as possible from them.
“Shinazugawa-san…there’s…there’s a-“ you looked like you were about to faint so he walked closer to you, spotting the aggressor, “(Y/N) is just a stupid frog, move your foot, it’ll go away on its own.” you shook your head closing your eyes shut, you didn’t want to hurt the poor animal out of your own silly phobia.
Sanemi crouched down to your feet, grabbing the little troublemaker and took it over to the edge of the river near your property. When he came back you were still frozen in place, sweating. “It’s gone now.” You were ridiculous, it was just a tiny frog, you couldn’t even defend yourself against a frog, how were you going to defend yourself against the odds of life. You let out a long-held breath, taking his hands in yours as a token of appreciation, quickly forgetting the hose was in your hand and getting his face completely wet.
“(Y/N)….you little piece of shit….” his face was red, a deep snarl on his face. You threw the hose to the ground and ran for your life, laughing in the process. “I’m so sorry!! Kyaaaaa, how are you this fast!” one step of his was five of yours, he caught up to you in no time and the look on his face was a sight to behold.
He wasn’t angry, his wet hair was sticking onto his face, and he was laughing. He looked way younger this way and it made you feel relived to see he was having as much fun as you did these days. Your hand reached his face, caressing the droplets of water away, a loving smile gracing your lips. He wasn’t sure when things started heading in this direction but he’s never felt that way before and he didn’t hate it.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
There weren’t more excuses for Sanemi to linger around, the rain was gone, the farm cleaned up from the storm, even the marmalade was ready to be sold. He offered to help you with the cart since it was even heavier now that the load had increased.
The idea was for him to take you downtown and then leave and move on with his life, find a job and a place to stay.
But you didn’t even know how to build the display table in the market and then unloading the cart is faster between two people. Then an old lady asked him for three jars of marmalade and by mid afternoon he was still by your side selling your goods.
“Sir, could I convince you and your wife to trade two of your jars for one of my chickens? I don’t have any money left but I would really like to take some home for my kids.” His what- the cloth he was using to clean the table ended up on the floor at her statement, taking him off-guard, you also didn’t say anything to deny it. “What do you think, dear husband? I think it would be a good idea, we could look around and see if we can find her a mate and get eggs from them.” so you were seriously not just going to ignore it but also go along with it-
“Um, yeah. There’s some spare wood in the shed, I could use that to build them a house.” the lady was now handing him the cage with said chicken, waiting anxiously for the last two jars of goodness to be her own.
“You make such a lovely couple; I wish my husband was as understanding and loving as yours. Thank you, my children and I will be forever in your debt, my youngest is celebrating her birthday today, I wanted to bring something special home.” it somehow warmed both of your hearts, you both think of days when you had a large family and how much fun you had eating delicious treats with your siblings, children laughter filling out every corner. “Thank you for your kind words, we’ll take good care of your chicken. I hope you and the children have a lovely evening!” and just like that the marmalade was officially sold out.
“So where do you think we can find Mia’s future husband?” he wasn’t sure how or when you and him became a ‘we’ but he wasn’t mad at how it sounded like and the intentions behind it. “Did you just name the fucking chicken?” he was used to your silly antics by now but it was still very much amusing to him, your quiet giggles confirming he was right. “I saw someone selling some chickens by the entrance, let’s go see if they have one after cleaning up.”
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
Time Skip~
It’s been ten years since Sanemi started coming to this market every morning. He still misses the fun days of demon hunting, but mostly he still misses his brother. Life wasn’t as good to Genya as it was to him, and he still felt guilty from living the life he wanted his brother to have.
Having a permanent stall in the market came with a lot of responsibilities and a lot of hard work, but his strength was put to good use by the smartest person he’s ever met.
“How much for the corn?” Sanemi, who was now cleaning the small worktable looked up to tend his first customer of the day. “If you take two you get one fr- Tomioka???” Giyuu was smirking at him from the other side of the table, a knowing look in his eyes. “That apron looks good on you, Shinazugawa.” Leaving the stall behind, he walked over to his old pillar mate, it’s been years since the last time they saw each other.
“Heard your stupid ass went to live with his old master like a sissy lost baby, near Tanjiro and the gang of brats.”
Some things never change.
“Yeah, it’s been a while, we didn’t even know you were still alive.” the conversation got cut short by a child clinging onto Sanemi’s leg, getting Giyuu’s attention. “Father, mother needs your help unloading the milk crates.”
Crouching down to his size, Giyuu stares into the child's eyes, lost in the memories of his lost friends, painful days of loss came right into his heart, “You look just like your uncle.” patting the child on the head, he smiled, the ghosts of his lost comrades shining behind the toddler. “I know, I was named Genma after uncle, but my hair is like this because of mother, the rest have father’s hair.” As if on cue you came out of the back with a baby tied to your back, an older looking boy than the one before him holding a sleeping girl in his arms. “Nemi, the milk!”
“I see you’ve been busy.” Sanemi’s face was red as a beet, making him grumble insults quietly for his child not to hear.
“I’ll do it in a second, come here, I want you to meet an old friend of mine.” this was the first time any of them had addressed the love-hate relationship they had in the past as friendship, but now being older they both agree that’s what it was. “Tomioka, this is my wife (Y/N)”
“It’s a pleasure to meet you…and your four children…” the smirk on his face was so sly nobody would notice it but Sanemi, it made him want to punch his guts like he would do back in the day when they were younger.
“Is that your wife over there, Tomioka-san? I see you also have a little one, take some of our milk, our kids love it!” The child looked just like him, it was an easy guess. You were doing your best to move around with a child on your back and a swell on your stomach, a promise of another youngster arriving soon. The woman behind Giyuu came holding his son and after a long chat and bunch of laughter they promised to go to your place for dinner soon.
Ten years ago Sanemi thought he had lost it all.
And he did.
But he made a silent promise to Genya after meeting you, he would live as long as he could, never waste the opportunity to live his brother gave him, never let his sacrifice be in vain, he would live for the both of them, he would bring life to this world and protect it the way he couldn’t protect his siblings, he would protect his family until his last breath and once that moment comes and he gets to see him again, he will have many stories to share as they embrace eternity together, as family.
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Tagged babes: @doumadono
Masterlist Bonus Chapter
#kimetsu no yaiba#demon slayer#demon slayer fanfic#kimetsu no yaiba fanfic#demon slayer x you#demon slayer x y/n#demon slayer x female reader#demon slayer hashira#wind hashira#wind pillar#shinazugawa sanemi#sanemi angst#sanemi x y/n#sanemi x you#sanemi x reader#fluff#angst#sanemi fluff#kimetsu no yaiba sanemi#i love this man
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The Loyal Pin - Episode 2
I have no idea what I am doing with this space each week. Am I thinking thoughts? Am I recapping the episode? Am I getting anxiety that I'll have to be more selective with the images I use since I'm only allowed thirty yet every second of this show is color-coded? Am I lusting after Pin and my girl Prik? All of the above?! Once again, I have no idea, so let me just get this post started at the beginning with Pin being the saddest Pink Person and cutting all the mangoes within 50 miles because her girlfriend is leaving.
The Blue Beauty Anin sends her loyal and trusty sidekick Prik to keep her girlfriend company while she is busy preparing for her move.
Because she knows no mangoes are safe and apparently papayas too! And while we get a flashback, we see that Pin is wearing blue ribbons in her hair because even if she can't put words to it, she's been in love with her Blue Beauty for a long time.
Probably before she even knew the word "love"
So while Anin is busy making arrangements with her color-coded brother,
Pin is haunting the halls already grieving her loss
Refusing to acknowledge that Anin is leaving (same girl, same)
Losing her appetite (and will to live), which her color-coded mother picks up on
And crushing Prik's spirit with the realization that Anin will be abroad for SEVEN DAMN YEARS!
Basically, Pin is in her sad girl era as she holds Anin's handkerchief and cries into her pillow.
But thankfully Prik acts like a ghost and snitches to her Blue Beauty Boss that their Pink Person is turning into Britney Spear's 2000 classic "Lucky" since "she cry, cry, cries in her lonely heart, thinking 'if there's nothing missing in my life then why do these tears come at night?'"
So Anin, in true Blue Beauty, fashion decides to make her girl happy by making food with her and eating it . . . alone since Pin still isn't eating.
And takes up every single waking moment of Pin's time.
They even celebrate Loy Krathong together, but the mood turns sad once Pin finally vocalizes that Anin is leaving FOR SEVEN DAMN YEARS!
So it's time for Anin to leave, and she says goodbye to her color-coded girlfriend and her color-coded aunt.
Oh, and her color-coded brothers!
But she immediately gets to writing her girl because if a letter is late, according to Prik, Pin is painting her nails black and listening to My Chemical Romance's "Ghost of You" on repeat until the letter arrives. Same girl, same.
However, Pin can read between the lines, and even though Anin is saying she is happy and writing about other friends (Anin knows other women?! Not in this sapphic love story she don't!),
Pin knows Anin is not happy and can see the teardrops on the letter as clear as day because they are the same album, but different songs. Alexa, play My Chemical Romance's "I'm Not Okay"!
Fuck it! Just play all of Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge! I'M in my emo feels!
But their SEVEN DAMN YEAR separation is coming to in end which we can tell because their hairstyles have changed, and our Blue Beauty has a plan up her sleeve!
Sidenote: The snow globe on her desk has one character in green and blue and the other is in red and pink. It's them!
But back to the plan! Now that Anin is graduating, she triple-checks with her color-coded family that the highly esteemed prince who just happens to be her dad is going to keep his promise of giving her anything she wants.
Because this bad (blue) bitch is getting the custom-made house she promised her girl! Sis secured the bag!
And Pin is proud as hell of her smarty-pants skirt (since the clothing is historical accurate?).
But as proud as she is of her, in the middle of a room filled with pink, blue, and purple (!!!!) flowers, she looks shocked to see her Blue Beauty right in front of her when the episode ends.
Anin is just full of surprises like appearing out of nowhere and coming back queerer than when she left. Good for her!
Bonus: Anin's mom is a Yellow/Orange Oddity, and I think as the girls continue to age, they will inherit more of their moms' colors into their wardrobes because of generational trauma, gender norms, and whatnot until they break against tradition and be gay do crime each other.
But either way, me and my huge emo album collection will be here doing whatever this is all season!
#the loyal pin#I'm obsessed with this show#color coded girls in love#the colors mean things#SUCH GOOD COLOR-CODING!#episode two#this is everything I needed and more#thank you Idol Factory
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Flowers | The Series | Chapter 17 | Surprise!
Summary: You receive even more unexpected visitors and receive some upsetting news that you are not looking forward to.
Jacaerys Velaryon x Dunn!Reader
a.n: GOD SO SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT !!! i really appreciate all the comments and promise to get around to responding to any ive missed !! hoping to have this story done by the end of the month <3 im already working on the next one as i write so dont worry about another long wait i swear.
series masterlist
taglist ! (open)
@newestobsessionishere @alexa554 @th3b4tm4n @hazzapotter @claire-loves-music @tssf-imagines @melsunshine @majoso12 @brain-empty-only-draken @urmomsgirlfriend1 @emmalvei-blog
You had thought that would be the most exciting thing to happen, Joffrey would stay for awhile before he returned to his duties in the eyrie and then everything would go back to the sort of normalcy you had before.
Yet your parents received a raven that had your stomach turning inside out. “We are to go to the Highgarden's to welcome prince Jacaerys and his soon to be wife lady Cassandra Baratheon for their engagement tour, Highgarden is apparently the first stop.” Your father ripped the letter for your mothers hands and skimmed it over himself, “They are asking all the families to arrive and bring an engagement gift? this is ridiculous!” Dorothy, the head maid of the house scoff as she placed a plate of food on the table. “The nerve of them.”
You have lost all your appetite.
you measly push around the food on your plate while everyone around you erupts into boisterous chatter. "after that man publicly humiliated my daughter? they dare ask this of us? the nerve!" "maybe she could fake illness and wont have to attend the festivities?" "i can already see their snug faces as they look upon her ugh i refuse to attend such an ordeal."
When your hands slam on the table all chatter seizes and all eyes turn to you where you keep your head down towards the table. wordlessly you walk out the hall and the others in the room look at each other concerned.
you find yourself mindlessly walking through the fields as you attempt to catch your breath. it is fine. you were simply not chosen that is all. and now he wants you to attend his stupid engagement tour? for an engagement to a women that is not you? you fall on your back and stare at the sky in disbelief. this was ridiculous almost outright shameless to point you cannot believe it was his idea. Cassandra never did like you maybe this was her way of trying to stick it to you and laugh in your face.
your face grows sour at the idea of having to watch her snarkily brag with jacaerys on her arm you were going to be sick.
You had thought you were finally making progress moving pass your feelings for the prince but if anything they have only gotten worse. you think of him far too often these days especially with joffrey and trisk here. a part of you wonder if he thinks of you too. its a foolish thought, he had made his choice and there was nothing else to do but to live with it and move on.
You close your eyes and fall into a light sleep unable to continue thinking in reality and far more interested in living in dream land where he laid with you as well. hes there waiting for you, the familiar flower fields of your homeland being a comforting sight and with him sitting there you fell all the more better. He strokes your cheek gently when you open your eyes to greet him, a comforting smile on his face. “my love.” your eyes fall closed as you grab his hand and press it closer to your skin. “wont you look at me?”
Harshly you shake your head, though the limbo you meet him in is merely a dream the pain of reality still stings at your skin. “you will not even allow me to hear your voice my love?” you squeeze your eyes shut as he caresses your face. “it hurts.” his other hand comes up and plays with your hair, “its alright my love just look at me.” you fight with yourself for a few moments before your eyes flutter open and your heart aches. He looks as beautiful as ever, smiling down at you with moon crested eyes.
“there you are.” you hate the way a smile creeps up on your face and you especially hate the way his grin grows at that. “i hate to see you so upset.” this has you huffing and you try to sit uo but he keeps you firmly in his lap. “you have no right to say that to me.” his face falls and he cups your cheek as you turn your head away from him. “im sorry.” “then why did you do it?” your fictional prince has no response and thats because you have no clue as well.
as if he is a brush of air he disappears as you willed him to and sit up with your head in your hands. he had basically told you he wanted to marry you, scared off any other suitors you could have had gods you were even in a courtship before he wormed his way in and for what? nothing.
You force your eyes open and suddenly you are right back to reality where you huff as you shakily stand taking a deep breath as you realize the sun is much higher in the sky. how long had you been out here? you decide you should head inside before you freeze at the silence around you.
the fields especially this time of year are bursting with people tending to the flowers for the seasons prep but you can’t see a single soul out there. You wonder where everyone could have gone, maybe you are still dreaming. you walk back towards the castle once taking one last final look around before heading inside and you pause.
now you know this must be a dream because why would three dragons be sitting on one of the empty fields not too far from your home. you must be seeing things.
Yet when you walk into the hall you quickly realize you are not making things up or seeing things as when you pinch your arm the group of three stands before you and you feel your stomach plummet. “just the lady we wished to see.”
you find yourself bowing as your mind races trying to understand what was going on, “my princes, princess.” “just the lady i was looking to see!” “you honor me my prince.” lucerys eagerly walks over to you and grips your hands in his. “i have missed you. things ive been grim without you.” Despite how confused you are by his presence or even his words you force out a smile, “You honor me.”
You have no clue what else to say or what else to do. Every single pair of eyes in the room are looking upon you and you look down at your hands as you mind tries to make sense of this mess. thankfully aemond grips lucerys back and tugs him away from you. “he is as eager as always do not mind him lady dunn.” You’re more than thankful for the saving, you weakly grin at him as you still try to make sense that members of the royal family now stand in your familys main hall.
your eyes drift towards your parents who seem just as bewildered and lost as you are. You use the opportunity of lucerys and aemond bickering with one another to slip around them to go stand next to your parents who urge you next to them. “what is happening?” Your mother tilts her head down towards your ear and your eyes widen in horror at her words.
—
jacaerys realizes his life ie much quieter today. As he roams around the halls he feels as though he is missing something but he has no clue what. He’s done all his studying, hes sat through the unbearable meeting with cassandra and his mother about the wedding preparations, he did his afternoon training what was missing?
He tried not to think about most things these days. Simply allowing life to pass around him while he keeps a mundane routine but today was truly throwing him off. When he walks into one of the common rooms he stops before cassandra and aegon who seem to be chatting about something at the table but the two stop when jacaery approaches, cassandra even looks embarrassed that jace had walked in on them but he does not acknowledge it. “my sweet nephew! finally done being broody today?”
He rolls his eyes, why does he even bother but as he turns to walk away he freezes and turns back around. “Where is everyone else?” Normally the rest of his siblings and lucerys would all be sitting around with him but only cassandra is there awkward sipping at her chalice full of what he only hopes to be tea.
Aegons grin turns sinister and jacaerys feels a pit of dread grow in his stomach. “oh did you not hear? they left to the reach just this morning. you know, for your tour.” Jacaerys stares in confusion as aegon takes a happy chug from his wine. “the engagement tour.” “i know the tour you speak of.” Aegons chuckles fill the room as cassandra looks back and forth between the two men. “why ever would they leave now? the tyrells are no where near ready to host.”
“oh no. theyre not staying with the tyrells.” jacaerys head turns in confusion while aegon only seems to be happier the more and more this conversation goes on. “did they not tell you? the dunn’s will be hosting them for our stay in the reach. Theyve gone to go hang out with our good friend lady y/n.”
Aegon cannot stop the roar of laughter that bubbles up in his throat at his own words and he folds over in his own fit of laughter. Cassandra looks bewildered by this news and sits up straight. “house dunn? truly? i thought flower hall was a rather, small place.”
Her real feelings about the matter and the state of house dunn and its hall very clear in her expression and tone. She looks over at jacaerys too worried about his reaction to only see a blank look on his face as he looks upon the two of them. Jacaerys rapidly blinks for a moment before he slowly opens his mouth. “how pleasant.” after which he spins on his heel and walks out the room swiftly.
Aegon pouts as he watches jacaerys leave, clearly he had been hoping for a better reaction out of the crowned prince. aegon however turns back towards cassandra with a smirk. “bah who cares about all that though right? lets go back to what we were talking about.” A blush creeps up on her face as aegon leans towards her the conversation they had just had with jacaerys already gone from her mind.
#jacaerys x reader#jace targaryen#jacerys x reader#jacaerys imagine#jacaerys strong#house of the dragon#hotd#jacaerys x you#jace x y/n#jace x you#jacaerys x y/n#jacaerys velaryon#jace velaryon#hotd imagine#hotd jacaerys#jacaerys velaryon x reader#jacaerys velaryon x you#hotd jace#jacaerys velaryon x y/n#jace x reader#jacaerys targaryen
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{ 152 }
motherland.
jinwoo sung x fem.reader
{ it's okay, even if you're not strong enough to erase all tears | after you rest your tired heart | wish for a better tomorrow and fall asleep | like the young children do... }
your heart was broken after receiving an email that detailed your poor performance on a series of assignments, the disappointment felt from your professor being all the more apparent with each word that you read.
you were currently in your kitchen, heating up some soup to eat for your lunch, but the sudden sour feeling felt in the pit of your stomach made you nauseous. your appetite was sapped from you as you looked at your phone, your anxieties mounting while reading each constructive criticism your professor had given you. you felt each word cut through your heart like a knife, slicing your confidence until it was left in shreds.
shutting off your stove, you allow the lukewarm soup to remain in the pot, your eyes never straying away from your phone and the email you received from your professor. he laments on his concern for your comprehension of the material, and asks if you would like to meet with him sometime this week to go over the material-
but you couldn’t bring yourself to reply to him, feeling your disappointment and stress boiling deep within your soul.
admittedly, you hated yourself.
you hated how you kept second guessing yourself and chose to write about the wrong answers.
you hated how much concern your professor held for you while questioning your competence.
but most importantly-
you hated how badly you had messed up and wanted nothing more than the earth to swallow you up whole.
ultimately… you didn’t want to even exist anymore.
your tears hinder your vision as you made your way back into your bedroom, landing headfirst into bed, allowing your phone to slip from your hands and onto the floor. choked sobs wracked through you, and you were crying so much that you made yourself become nauseous in response.
you had been wallowing in your misery for a few minutes when you felt the air suddenly shift around you, yet your tears drown out the sounds of the shadowy wisps parting, making way for your boyfriend as his heavy footsteps were heard coming into your room.
“my love… oh, my darling treasure.” jinwoo coos at you, taking advantage of his strength as he picks you up from the bed and into his strong embrace. he comforts you, pressing lingering kisses against your damp skin, tasting the saltiness of your tears as your chest began to heave endlessly in tune to your cries.
it worsens with jinwoo’s sudden appearance, yet still, you cling to him, your cries growing in intensity as you desperately sought comfort from him.
but jinwoo does little to try and stop your tears. he simply holds you close to his chest, letting your tears wet the front of his turtleneck sweater while drawing comforting circles against your back. it wasn’t until several minutes later that you were able to calm down, your cries simmering down to soft sniffles as your tears went from a cascade to singular droplets felt against your skin (like spring rain.)
jinwoo continues to hold you in his embrace, settling you down on his lap the moment he takes a seat against the mattress of your shared bed. he brushes back your hair before gently framing at your face. he keeps your head still before leaning forward to press a kiss against your forehead.
“what’s wrong? the moment bellion and beru sent me distress signals pertaining to you… i looked through their eyes and saw you crying your eyes out.”
a pained expression was seen within jinwoo’s grey eyes when he frames at your face again, forcing you to meet his gaze. “seeing you so broken hurt me, sarang, so please, tell me what happened?”
you close your eyes and give jinwoo a nod, slowly telling him about the email you received from your professor as you were making your lunch. you admit to him about how you failed, which sends another wave of sobs to course through you.
yet jinwoo remains vigilant when it comes to comforting you and simply holds you tighter to his chest, whispering loving words to you. when you were done with your explanation did jinwoo begin to speak his thoughts aloud.
“it’s okay, sometimes failures can be more beneficial than successes. they help us grow and learn new things, and i know that this experience will only serve to make you stronger and smarter. and besides, despite your shortcomings, your professor even stated on how much he’s willing to help you do better.” he gently pulls you away from his chest, chuckling lightly at your pouting face.
you take in a deep breath, already beginning to feel better the more you listened to his words, “do you mean it, jinwoo?”
your loving boyfriend simply gives you a nod, all while brushing back your hair. “i do… just remember, even if you fail again, it’s not the end of the world. we all fail at some point in our lives; it’s a very normal- a very human experience.”
feeling deeply comforted by his words, you come closer to him and throw your arms around him, squeezing him tightly against your form.
“thank you… for coming to me when you knew i needed you the most. your words make me feel so much better… and i love you for it.”
“i love you too, sarang.”
jinwoo proceeds to kiss away your remaining tears before picking you up within his embrace, nuzzling your face before going into the kitchen to cook you your favorite meal, wanting to cheer you up as you basked in his unconditional love for you.
a.n. - today has been a little rough on me, and i wanted to write a comfort fic with jinwoo to help me feel better. failure sucks, but ultimately, it’s part of being human… as long as i’m willing to learn from my mistakes, then there’s always a chance ♡
all stories are written by rei; reposts, translations, and plagiarism are not allowed.
#sung jinwoo x reader#jinwoo sung x reader#sung jinwoo x you#jinwoo sung x you#sung jinwoo#jinwoo sung#solo leveling x reader#.stories
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